Girls, what's in it for you?

[high_voice]

I think a lot of guys hesitate to ask their girlfriend to participate because it seems selfish to ask a girl to inflict mental and physical pain on you IF she’s not receiving some simultaneous gratification.

As I was getting busted before, I’ve thought “What’s in this for her?”

Every guy on this board will admit to thinking “I want my balls slapped around by that girl.” Do females think “I’d like to get his balls in my grip!”

I can think of several answers that would seem obvious, but I’d like to hear what a few females on this site have to say about what they get from teasing and pleasing a guy by administering pain to his balls.

[PapaBear]

high voice:

You have posed a truly insightful question, as every male ballbustee I've come to know has a tremendous desire to feed off the enjoyment those women who bust our balls seem to be able to experience. It's almost like being able to experience that enjoyment through the gift of our manhood to such activities develops a sense of enhanced worth and self-esteem at being able to lovingly submit our most precious possession to women rather than domianting the world in our testosterone induced aggression. In my long career of enjoying being busted (form early elementary school in the 1950's until now), the most "sub space" producing high I ever experienced was when Ms. Amanda Wildefyre in Minneapolis/St. Paul pulled on some dog groomer gloves with those hair combing "needles" and gave a totally disarming (to me), sadistically frightening laugh as she raked by vulnerable testicles with those gloves! I imagined that she did appreciate my predicament and her omnipotent position of control over my most precious evidence of manhood.

In my 33 years of marriage, it has been just that lack of getting something for her that has prevented our marital intimacy from embracing ball busting, in spite of the fact that my wife of all those years is a great role player and loves acting, and she is one of the biggest verbal teases I know. She just can't find something other than revulsion at causing me pain from ball bust activities, and she has attemtped many at my pleadings in our earlier years.

So yes, would the ladies herein please try to articulate what you "get" from having a man's so terribly vulnerable (thank you, God!) essence of our man- hood in your grasp or delivering a knee buckling and high pitched scream- producing strike to our delicate jewels! We males think totally differently about those danglers between our legs than you do, and it's only through discussions like this one that we "subs" can learn to appreciate your "take" from getting to be dominant and sadistic in this most intimate manner!

Waiting Hopefully To Learn More,
PapaBear :ibow4u:

[SadisticSara]

So many different reasons. Different women have different reasons.

Some do it for money.

Some do it to please their partner, out of affection or love.

Some do it out of curiosity, mostly because it's something "forbidden".

Some women get sexually stimulated by it.

There are sadistic women who just enjoy inflicting pain on men, women or animals.

Other women are man-haters, because of previously being abused or taken advantage of.

Others like the role reversal, and just don't like the traditional ways that men always have to be in control of women as if they were inferior beings or possessions.

Other women enjoy being the boss of any relationship they find, whether with men, women or pets.

Others are turned on by anything at all that turns on their partner.

Others feel that they'll be rejected unless they do whatever pleases their partner.

Some don't know why they like it. Maybe they haven't analyzed it or maybe they aren't good at articulating reasons. They just know that they like it and don't need an exact logical explanation of why.

For others (like me) it's a combination of 2 or more of these reasons, since there's some overlapping, or because they have more than one reason.

There must be other reasons that I haven't mentioned.
Let's hear from some other women here too.

- Sara :)

[Trouble]

Trouble is not a woman (sorry; it's a genetic condition), but...

In my 33 years of marriage, it has been just that lack of getting something for her that has prevented our marital intimacy from embracing ball busting, in spite of the fact that my wife of all those years is a great role player and loves acting, and she is one of the biggest verbal teases I know. She just can't find something other than revulsion at causing me pain from ball bust activities, and she has attemtped many at my pleadings in our earlier years.
...Papa Bear, you may have already tried this one, but, if not, it might get you and the Mrs. halfway there.

Role-play this: your wife plays a pseudo-ballbuster. She takes your balls in her hand(s) and threatens you, comments on how vulberable you are now that your testicles are in her hands, etc.. You'll have to roleplay a bit to get enjoyment from it, since deep down you are convinced she won't do it, but, truly, there is always a chance that she might, no matter how many times she has had the chance and passed it up. Hang on to that slim possibility and keep it in mind; you won't get the physical force, but you'll get the psychological effect.

My most recent partner was a woman who hates men, especilly her ex-husband. She was very easy to "recruit". :D

[iron horse]

So many different reasons. Different women have different reasons.

Some do it for money.

Some do it to please their partner, out of affection or love.

Some do it out of curiosity, mostly because it's something "forbidden".

Some women get sexually stimulated by it.

There are sadistic women who just enjoy inflicting pain on men, women or animals.

Other women are man-haters, because of previously being abused or taken advantage of.

Others like the role reversal, and just don't like the traditional ways that men always have to be in control of women as if they were inferior beings or possessions.

Other women enjoy being the boss of any relationship they find, whether with men, women or pets.

Others are turned on by anything at all that turns on their partner.

Others feel that they'll be rejected unless they do whatever pleases their partner.

Some don't know why they like it. Maybe they haven't analyzed it or maybe they aren't good at articulating reasons. They just know that they like it and don't need an exact logical explanation of why.

For others (like me) it's a combination of 2 or more of these reasons, since there's some overlapping, or because they have more than one reason.

There must be other reasons that I haven't mentioned.
Let's hear from some other women here too.

- Sara :)


So Sara, tell us which of those reasons motivate *you*. By the way, do you ever view the photos and videos on femaledom.com? As a woman, do you find them arousing, and do you enjoy watching men get their balls busted in such vids and pics even though the man is not your partner?

[Geezer]

Here's a thought for Papa Bear (and maybe, his queezy Momma Bear):

My wife was always afraid of hurting me by squeezing my balls too hard (even with my pleading for her to squeeze me hard just as I was about to cum) until I proved to her that she could squeeze me hard without doing me damage...yeah, she understood the difference between hurting and harming me but she was really afraid of "harming" my guys if she went past my limit...which she didn't know and wouldn't have known if I hadn't shown her just how far to go.

I had her sit on a low stool in front of my chair and take one of my balls in each hand. I showed her to hold each ball so it wouldn't squish out of her grip when she applied some pressure. I told her that the only way to make me stop was to squeeze me harder than I was about to squeeze her...then I took each of her nipples between a thumb and forefinger and proceeded to slowly squeeze them, gently at first then harder and harder. She soon got the idea that she had to squeeze me just as hard as I squeezed her and soon the harder I squeezed her nipples, the harder she squeezed my balls...all the time watching me enjoy the pain and encourage her to keep up harder and harder pressure. I knew that the worst I would do to her would be to bruise her and as my pressure got harder, she squeezed me harder until I had to let up my pressure on her...then I slowly went at her again...and again until she realized that she could squeeze my nuts really hard if she built up the pressure slowly.

I don't like hitting or kicking and she never would hit or kick me but she got really good at squeezing my 'nads hard, and soon learned where my top limit was. It was great! I just wish that she had used Sara's trick and gave me that little bit more than I really wanted, but she never took on that independence. Pity.

The Geezer

[SadisticSara]

So Sara, tell us which of those reasons motivate *you*. By the way, do you ever view the photos and videos on femaledom.com? As a woman, do you find them arousing, and do you enjoy watching men get their balls busted in such vids and pics even though the man is not your partner?



OK, I'll go through the list I wrote and add my comments on which ones motivate me, and to what degree:


Some do it for money. - (Definitely not!)

Some do it to please their partner, out of affection or love. - (Yes!)

Some do it out of curiosity, mostly because it's something "forbidden". - (To a very minor degree.)

Some women get sexually stimulated by it. - (Yes. Hopefully. Since I only do it with guys I love or like a lot.)

There are sadistic women who just enjoy inflicting pain on men, women or animals. - (No. That's sick!)

Other women are man-haters, because of previously being abused or taken advantage of. - (Nope.)

Others like the role reversal, and just don't like the traditional ways that men always have to be in control of women as if they were inferior beings or possessions. - (Yes.)

Other women enjoy being the boss of any relationship they find, whether with men, women or pets. - (Usually. But not always.)

Others are turned on by anything at all that turns on their partner. - (Yes. Within reasonable limits.)

Others feel that they'll be rejected unless they do whatever pleases their partner. - (No. I'm not that insecure or desperate.)

Some don't know why they like it. Maybe they haven't analyzed it or maybe they aren't good at articulating reasons. They just know that they like it and don't need an exact logical explanation of why. - (Nothing can be explained a hundred percent. Not everything needs an exact logical reason. But I rarely have problems articulating my reasons or expressing myself coherently, clearly, and effectively.)



--- I occasionally look at the photos and some videos at femaledom.com, primarily to understand posts here that mention the content there. I've only downloaded one video. I only find the pics and videos mildly sexually arousing, probably because (as I already mentioned) I only do it with guys I love or like a lot. I seem to need the intimate emotional component, so I'm not typical. I think it's more of a male-oriented erotic site. There are women who enjoy it though. And I really do think that guys interested in the erotic, fetish-related topics mentioned in these Forums should sign up for a one month subscription to check it out.

I'm not getting paid for recommending it, nor do I get any commissions, so you should take my advice as being impartial and not motivated by anything except your interests and what I think you would find stimulating, enjoyable, pleasurable, worthwhile and economical.

- Sara :)

[BMBY2003]

Sara wrote:
1. Some do it to please their partner, out of affection or love. - (Yes!)
2. Some women get sexually stimulated by it. - (Yes. Hopefully. Since I only do it with guys I love or like a lot.)

I often feel I have coaxed (maybe pressured) my wife, and she does it for the above #1 reason. I would really prefer more spontenaety (sorry for the poor spelling) and feel that we can only achieve that if she moves to #2 reason. Trouble is, I'm not sure how to help her get there. Ideas, anyone?

[PapaBear]

Trouble, Geezer, BMBY2003 & Sara:

I think everything all of you have suggested are important in potentially getting Mrs. Bear interested in busting me, and from your posts Geezer, I bet you really miss (as your refer to your wife in the past tense) Mrs. Geezer. But let my try and combine all of your thoughts into something that the females out there might be able to confirm!

Let me start with two little jokes that might illustrate what I'm going to suggest:

1) "What is the lightest thing in the world? Answer: A healthy penis, as it only takes a fleeting thought to lift it up!

2) Who is the strongest animal in the world? A sexy woman because not even the might of Superman can keep "it" down if she purposes to raise him up!

What BMBY2003 states resonates with my experience, in that I've always desired for Mrs. Bear to "get" a sexually satisfying experience from busting me in any of the many forms discussed elsewhere in this forum. But we guys have to understand that it is nearly impossibly difficult to obtain in reality what it does for us in our fantasies! This is because what we are wishing for is more a product of our maleness, i.e, we get intense sexual sensations from the connection between our genitals and our minds, than it is a probility in a woman's reality (they are definitely wired differently!). So while we can get absolutely raging, throbbing erections from a fantasy thought of our lady screaming in ecstatic orgasm from busting us, the act of busting us DOESN'T touch any of her physical errogenous zones, and therefore, such desired climax could only result from some contact between her sexual mechanisms and the phsycological (or more likely emotional) "get" she might allow herself to receive from the our vulnerablity to her act, the role reversal aspects, the explicit or implicit power transfers, etc. So BMBY2003, I'm sad to report that your desire of her getting sexual arousal that drives her to bust you is only going to be possible in that psychological area that Trouble intimates in his remarks above.

I've come to believe that the best "get" Mrs. Bear could find in bb activities would be to really enjoy two things: 1) those desperately desired (by me) reactions from me to her busting me might satisfy her desire to lovingly accept me by participating in bb play, and 2) she allow herself to explore and enjoy all the satisfying psychological and emotional aspects of busting a (her) male in the most intimate of ways. More than that just isn't going to happen unless you design a clitoral stimulator that is activated by each stroke she applies to your manhood! :)

So thank you all about your advice concerning Mrs. Bear! But for now, I'll have to be faithful that some day I can experience from her what I experienced as the ultimate BB feedback from a woma, when Ms. Amanda Wildefyre used her dog groomer gloves to rub my testicles together and gave an amazingly enjoyable laugh that just melted into my mind forever how a woman could enjoy busting my genitals!!
PapaBear :)