http://malesurvivor.interworksinc.com/board/ubbthreads.php

[fightfair]

I've been thinking about this for a while and this is the best thread for it. There's a lot on my mind about this thread and this site in general, but I'll spare you the details. Below are two sites that people here can check out and judge for themselves. At malesurvivor I am AshSurvived on the boards and bongobrain in the chat.

This is not an official invitation to either site and I am simply a survivor who is getting great benefit from the resources and community there and have been thinking for a while that I have a duty to at least provide this info, these resources for all the men here who wouldn not otherwise consider themselves survivors.

This isn't a judgement call or anything, it's my acknowledgement that behind the fantasies are real people with real expereiences and perhaps real trauma and my consideration of the fact that more and more men are coming forward for help and realising they were not 'initiated' by women but were in fact deeply wounded as children.

For a great supportive forum and chat:
http://malesurvivor.interworksinc.com/board/ubbthreads.php

For an old site with many resources for victims of female abusers:
http://www.menweb.org/sexabupg.htm

If you have questions you can post them here, but better to address them to me at malesurvivor where there are others in the same boat who can relate and offer their perspective. One pertinent issue is: 'such and such happened, so I must have liked it...' which is way too common for all victims, whether it's femdom style or gay grooming style abuse. And not surprisingly many who were abused in a gay context have issues with gay fantasies in the same way we do with dominant women and pain.

I also want to say I am not against femaledom.com or similar sites, in as much as they provide a safe 'virtual' environment where I can express this side of myself while I heal, because this is still how I am and better I am here reading and looking than locked away in the bathroom crying and cutting.

I hope this isn't perceievd as spam, I know I haven't posted here for ages and that's because I take this pretty seriously and have been very conflicted about posting something like this in a fetish forum that I frequent. I've wondered about the ethics and the best approach, but I finally decided to just do it.

I am cross posting this as a separate thread also because I believe it's very important. Since I started seeing a male sexual abuse specialist shrink (which is free if you live in Australia, through CASA) my life has turned around and I hate to think of people going through what I went through and living with that trauma for the rest of their lives.

[tonyr]

Dear Bro FightFair,

This is a quality thread that you have placed here and first of all, I sympathise with your sad experiences. Secondly, I believe too, that you are more that capable of rising above and beyond and your starting of this thread is living proof of this.
I do so hope that all of the forum members and viewers take this thread seriously.
The psychology of abuse is akin to mind control. Victims shut off the experiences and many abusers feed on this fact. The trauma that they generate, does not go away and it too often distroys the victims over a lifetime. I hope that you are on your way forwards without too much pain and suffering.

So much is about us being responsible with what we are interested in and about. I hope more will make the effort to understand this vast and complex subject of abuse. I for one would like forum members to realise the importance of keeping Adult Consentual material of a ballbusting nature completely separate from the proliferation of non-consentual and non-adult material. They are two complete diferent worlds. The more of us that make that clear distinction know to the filesharing sites, the content creators, and site operators, the clearer the message will be and thus will be on a path towards respect and true decency. As adults, we have a very clear and important responsiblity to the up and comming generations. Recognition of abuse, no matter how small, even if it is the placing of adult consentual Bb amongst material that is non consentual and or material that has teenagers pranking about, needs to be recognised as wrong and grossly irresponsible and will serve as fodder for those wishing to impose restrcitions on adult consentual material.

[James Market]

I beleive that is Shawn Badyk aka FMDSV from YouTube. He is Hell-bent on a mission to erradicate ballbusting from the Net. This guy has some serious problems.Spam!


I've been thinking about this for a while and this is the best thread for it. There's a lot on my mind about this thread and this site in general, but I'll spare you the details. Below are two sites that people here can check out and judge for themselves. At malesurvivor I am AshSurvived on the boards and bongobrain in the chat.

This is not an official invitation to either site and I am simply a survivor who is getting great benefit from the resources and community there and have been thinking for a while that I have a duty to at least provide this info, these resources for all the men here who wouldn not otherwise consider themselves survivors.

This isn't a judgement call or anything, it's my acknowledgement that behind the fantasies are real people with real expereiences and perhaps real trauma and my consideration of the fact that more and more men are coming forward for help and realising they were not 'initiated' by women but were in fact deeply wounded as children.

For a great supportive forum and chat:
http://malesurvivor.interworksinc.com/board/ubbthreads.php

For an old site with many resources for victims of female abusers:
http://www.menweb.org/sexabupg.htm

If you have questions you can post them here, but better to address them to me at malesurvivor where there are others in the same boat who can relate and offer their perspective. One pertinent issue is: 'such and such happened, so I must have liked it...' which is way too common for all victims, whether it's femdom style or gay grooming style abuse. And not surprisingly many who were abused in a gay context have issues with gay fantasies in the same way we do with dominant women and pain.

I also want to say I am not against femaledom.com or similar sites, in as much as they provide a safe 'virtual' environment where I can express this side of myself while I heal, because this is still how I am and better I am here reading and looking than locked away in the bathroom crying and cutting.

I hope this isn't perceievd as spam, I know I haven't posted here for ages and that's because I take this pretty seriously and have been very conflicted about posting something like this in a fetish forum that I frequent. I've wondered about the ethics and the best approach, but I finally decided to just do it.

I am cross posting this as a separate thread also because I believe it's very important. Since I started seeing a male sexual abuse specialist shrink (which is free if you live in Australia, through CASA) my life has turned around and I hate to think of people going through what I went through and living with that trauma for the rest of their lives.

[agnetha]

Hello,

and this site is about consentual bb between adults. The original post is not relevant.

Whilst sexual abuse of men/boys is probably almost as old as time I feel that the web can allow discussion and support and hope it helps the victims.

Or, beware the self righteous giving themselves emotive labels to make themselves matter more and impose their views on others.

Aggie

[gary198]

I've been thinking about this for a while and this is the best thread for it. There's a lot on my mind about this thread and this site in general, but I'll spare you the details. Below are two sites that people here can check out and judge for themselves. At malesurvivor I am AshSurvived on the boards and bongobrain in the chat.

This is not an official invitation to either site and I am simply a survivor who is getting great benefit from the resources and community there and have been thinking for a while that I have a duty to at least provide this info, these resources for all the men here who wouldn not otherwise consider themselves survivors.

This isn't a judgement call or anything, it's my acknowledgement that behind the fantasies are real people with real expereiences and perhaps real trauma and my consideration of the fact that more and more men are coming forward for help and realising they were not 'initiated' by women but were in fact deeply wounded as children.

For a great supportive forum and chat:
http://malesurvivor.interworksinc.com/board/ubbthreads.php

For an old site with many resources for victims of female abusers:
http://www.menweb.org/sexabupg.htm

If you have questions you can post them here, but better to address them to me at malesurvivor where there are others in the same boat who can relate and offer their perspective. One pertinent issue is: 'such and such happened, so I must have liked it...' which is way too common for all victims, whether it's femdom style or gay grooming style abuse. And not surprisingly many who were abused in a gay context have issues with gay fantasies in the same way we do with dominant women and pain.

I also want to say I am not against femaledom.com or similar sites, in as much as they provide a safe 'virtual' environment where I can express this side of myself while I heal, because this is still how I am and better I am here reading and looking than locked away in the bathroom crying and cutting.

I hope this isn't perceievd as spam, I know I haven't posted here for ages and that's because I take this pretty seriously and have been very conflicted about posting something like this in a fetish forum that I frequent. I've wondered about the ethics and the best approach, but I finally decided to just do it.

I am cross posting this as a separate thread also because I believe it's very important. Since I started seeing a male sexual abuse specialist shrink (which is free if you live in Australia, through CASA) my life has turned around and I hate to think of people going through what I went through and living with that trauma for the rest of their lives.


We are all here by CHOICE. Consenting adults should be able to do what is appropiate for each couple.

[astralpanda]

I've been thinking about this for a while and this is the best thread for it. There's a lot on my mind about this thread and this site in general, but I'll spare you the details. Below are two sites that people here can check out and judge for themselves. At malesurvivor I am AshSurvived on the boards and bongobrain in the chat.

This is not an official invitation to either site and I am simply a survivor who is getting great benefit from the resources and community there and have been thinking for a while that I have a duty to at least provide this info, these resources for all the men here who wouldn not otherwise consider themselves survivors.

This isn't a judgement call or anything, it's my acknowledgement that behind the fantasies are real people with real expereiences and perhaps real trauma and my consideration of the fact that more and more men are coming forward for help and realising they were not 'initiated' by women but were in fact deeply wounded as children.

For a great supportive forum and chat:
http://malesurvivor.interworksinc.com/board/ubbthreads.php

For an old site with many resources for victims of female abusers:
http://www.menweb.org/sexabupg.htm

If you have questions you can post them here, but better to address them to me at malesurvivor where there are others in the same boat who can relate and offer their perspective. One pertinent issue is: 'such and such happened, so I must have liked it...' which is way too common for all victims, whether it's femdom style or gay grooming style abuse. And not surprisingly many who were abused in a gay context have issues with gay fantasies in the same way we do with dominant women and pain.

I also want to say I am not against femaledom.com or similar sites, in as much as they provide a safe 'virtual' environment where I can express this side of myself while I heal, because this is still how I am and better I am here reading and looking than locked away in the bathroom crying and cutting.

I hope this isn't perceievd as spam, I know I haven't posted here for ages and that's because I take this pretty seriously and have been very conflicted about posting something like this in a fetish forum that I frequent. I've wondered about the ethics and the best approach, but I finally decided to just do it.

I am cross posting this as a separate thread also because I believe it's very important. Since I started seeing a male sexual abuse specialist shrink (which is free if you live in Australia, through CASA) my life has turned around and I hate to think of people going through what I went through and living with that trauma for the rest of their lives.

You've been reported for spam. I'm sure I'm not the only one who's tired of seeing this same post over and over again.

[fightfair]

If you are worried about spam from wholly altruistic non profit organisations full of people who dedicate their lives to helping victims of **** and child abuse, I feel a deep pity for you. Though I am not affiliated in any way, and this post has appeared in two thread because I believe it is important and relevant to those who were 'initiated' and to the general forum.

Thanks for the support Tony, it is much appreciated.

If you don't want help, you don't have to seek it. The stats show, and if you wanted help you would know this already, that nearly all men abused by women fail to ever seek help. When confronted with the realisation that it was abuse, they assert that it was initiation, whereas the majority may consider that a young girl being kicked in the vagina is hardly initiation.

In fact if you look in the British 'Independent' you will find a recent article where a mother has been jailed in 'the worst case of chid abuse I have ever seen' said the judge - for, among other things, kicking her 4 year old daughter in the vagina so badly she needed to be put under anesthetic to allow doctors o even inspect the damage and write a report..

Child abuse is very real. I am very real. I have been here a long, long time. I have been on other boards a long time. And I am aware of the way many people here think. But if I don't offer people who need it a way to get the help they deserve, who will?

I ask you, man to man. Who will reach out to 'perverts', to 'fetishists'? Surely you'd rather one of your own than someone who wants to outlaw this type of thing. What do hurt people stand to lose by finding other hurt people they can talk to, by gaining other perspectives?

If indeed this is considered spam, and I highly doubt it, I will move to have a small sticky made in the interests of business giving back the community, being responsible. With all the links available on the topic for all those who feel they are ready to take that step or would like to investigate it for themselves. What do I stand to gain from your derision and misrepresentation? I can feel pain and submission here in many other ways and with the administration of professionals.

Let others choose for themselves, don't stand in the way of other people's right to sek out help and support.

Panda: Have the courage to live up to your own credo.

[fightfair]

I have replied here:

http://femaledom.com/forum/showthread.php?p=26123#post26123

I didn't actually think through the logistics of posting in two thread, cos I've never done it before.

I won't address your replies directly, because they are encapsulated in the original post which is so extrememly relevent given the stuff in the link above.

I can only encourage others to follow astralpandas creed as I have urged him to do also: 'Deny Ignorance'.

To briefly summarise: the scant data availble on male survivors of female abuse shows they mostly view it as initiation. Consent, pleasure, adults, sexuality, these are all things discussed by people dealing with this stuff every day, it's in every book and on every board. Agnetha's lack of knowlege on the topic needn't be held againt her, it's normal, and since my post is directed to men, it's simply not relevent.

You also have the choice to get help if you want it, you have the choice to seek insight if you want it, you have the choice to shut down, shut it out and carry on if you want that to. It's all your choice, again, surely this is implicit.

I also relaise that for many here, ballbusting is a lifestyle and one doesn't throw away a lifestyle on a whim, and one protects it with all their might. Defensiveness is to be expected. But I understand. Because I am here, have been here longer than a lot of people, have been in the scene longer than a lot of you. I remember your first posts and when you joined. I have spent a lot of time here.

As to Shawn, I know of him too. In fact he's also from Australia, and yes I probably know more about him than you, it's just something that is. But no, I'm not him, I'm not a Serb and I don't run any websites and I don't have a 'good looking face'.

I know for this forum, the mood here, this is a definte mood killer. I might as well walk into a hellfire club and say all this at the top of my voice. But this isn't a hellfire club and you all have time to think and consider, and I'm not just walking in off the street, I was here before you arrived and I needed a few drinks to get the courage up, but believe it or not, someone cares enough to do this, strange as that may seem, self righteous and odd as that may appear, someone actually cares, and there are others too.

So when you've calmed down, gone on your merry way, maybe in a few years something will come back to you, a body memory, a strange coincidence and you might remember this post, you might wonder about it, think it was stupid, wonder what 'fightfair' was trying to do, was he the real deal, can you 'trust' people, is there a trust issue, do you feel like talking to someone perhaps? That will be your choice, huff and puff now all you like, but I've been there, and I've done it, it won't be news to me. Try not to confuse self-righteousness with hindsight; the self righteous don't make a habit of spilling out their personal lives in an effort to really change and move on and give something back to a community that has given so much to them.

[astralpanda]

If you are worried about spam from wholly altruistic non profit organisations full of people who dedicate their lives to helping victims of **** and child abuse, I feel a deep pity for you. Though I am not affiliated in any way, and this post has appeared in two thread because I believe it is important and relevant to those who were 'initiated' and to the general forum.

Thanks for the support Tony, it is much appreciated.

If you don't want help, you don't have to seek it. The stats show, and if you wanted help you would know this already, that nearly all men abused by women fail to ever seek help. When confronted with the realisation that it was abuse, they assert that it was initiation, whereas the majority may consider that a young girl being kicked in the vagina is hardly initiation.

In fact if you look in the British 'Independent' you will find a recent article where a mother has been jailed in 'the worst case of chid abuse I have ever seen' said the judge - for, among other things, kicking her 4 year old daughter in the vagina so badly she needed to be put under anesthetic to allow doctors o even inspect the damage and write a report..

Child abuse is very real. I am very real. I have been here a long, long time. I have been on other boards a long time. And I am aware of the way many people here think. But if I don't offer people who need it a way to get the help they deserve, who will?

I ask you, man to man. Who will reach out to 'perverts', to 'fetishists'? Surely you'd rather one of your own than someone who wants to outlaw this type of thing. What do hurt people stand to lose by finding other hurt people they can talk to, by gaining other perspectives?

If indeed this is considered spam, and I highly doubt it, I will move to have a small sticky made in the interests of business giving back the community, being responsible. With all the links available on the topic for all those who feel they are ready to take that step or would like to investigate it for themselves. What do I stand to gain from your derision and misrepresentation? I can feel pain and submission here in many other ways and with the administration of professionals.

Let others choose for themselves, don't stand in the way of other people's right to sek out help and support.

Panda: Have the courage to live up to your own credo.

Spam! Where's the "ban for life" button...?

[aku]

Spam! Where's the "ban for life" button...?

i hate spam....but his post is not spam....it is not selling anything so get off his back.

if you dont like, dont read read or follow the like:soomad

[astralpanda]

i hate spam....but his post is not spam....it is not selling anything so get off his back.

if you dont like, dont read read or follow the like:soomad

From Dictionary.com:
spam

2. to post unwanted electronic messages: to post a message many times to a newsgroup, or an inappropriate message to multiple newsgroups

You see, that's actually the very definition of spam. And it's pretty hard not read when it's sprinkled all over the site. Get your facts straight.

[fightfair]

I didn't realise this post had gone in twice on the same thread, but then reading panda's reply I realised I have nothing to aplogise for. He's forfeited the right to be treated as an adult.

If I do some day get the courage to suggest a sticky (note: I haven't been banned, the mods don't think this is spam, you can stop being a vigilante now, no one is listening) I will also suggest we are provided with an 'ignore user' button. That way this site will be much cleaner, and people can focus on their interests.

Then, if you only want picutres, you can have that option, if you don't want to listen to the new breed of crazies (read: hurting, defensive and abusive people) like panda and CP who have tried to take over here, you can simply screen them out. if you don't want to listen to people with real feelings and thoughts you can screen us out too. :thumbup

[jinyang]

I've been thinking about this for a while and this is the best thread for it. There's a lot on my mind about this thread and this site in general, but I'll spare you the details. Below are two sites that people here can check out and judge for themselves. At malesurvivor I am AshSurvived on the boards and bongobrain in the chat.

This is not an official invitation to either site and I am simply a survivor who is getting great benefit from the resources and community there and have been thinking for a while that I have a duty to at least provide this info, these resources for all the men here who wouldn not otherwise consider themselves survivors.

This isn't a judgement call or anything, it's my acknowledgement that behind the fantasies are real people with real expereiences and perhaps real trauma and my consideration of the fact that more and more men are coming forward for help and realising they were not 'initiated' by women but were in fact deeply wounded as children.

For a great supportive forum and chat:
http://malesurvivor.interworksinc.com/board/ubbthreads.php

For an old site with many resources for victims of female abusers:
http://www.menweb.org/sexabupg.htm

If you have questions you can post them here, but better to address them to me at malesurvivor where there are others in the same boat who can relate and offer their perspective. One pertinent issue is: 'such and such happened, so I must have liked it...' which is way too common for all victims, whether it's femdom style or gay grooming style abuse. And not surprisingly many who were abused in a gay context have issues with gay fantasies in the same way we do with dominant women and pain.

I also want to say I am not against femaledom.com or similar sites, in as much as they provide a safe 'virtual' environment where I can express this side of myself while I heal, because this is still how I am and better I am here reading and looking than locked away in the bathroom crying and cutting.

I hope this isn't perceievd as spam, I know I haven't posted here for ages and that's because I take this pretty seriously and have been very conflicted about posting something like this in a fetish forum that I frequent. I've wondered about the ethics and the best approach, but I finally decided to just do it.

I am cross posting this as a separate thread also because I believe it's very important. Since I started seeing a male sexual abuse specialist shrink (which is free if you live in Australia, through CASA) my life has turned around and I hate to think of people going through what I went through and living with that trauma for the rest of their lives.
so strang haha