Richter
08-15-2007, 03:19 PM
Honestly, I'm not sure why I'm even posting this. It's not original or good, but what the heck. Maybe someone else can make it better. This is the story of Simon vs the genie of the lamp. He gets three wishes to change his life, but the genie keeps turning it into a ballbusting scenario. The writing is my favorite bits of other people's story strung together and rewritten to fit. It is extremely long and each wish is really a full long story in itself. If you just want to skip, the first wish puts Simon as a pro wrestler, but he faces a very violent Chyna. The second wish puts Simon as a martial artist, but inside a video game and the genie plays the other side as Lara Croft, Sophitia, and Nina. It's almost just a list of all the bb moves that are in fighting games. The third wish puts Simon as a superhero, but he ends up captured and tortured by Harley Quinn and the Scarlet Witch. I can never seem to finish the third wish story because it turns me on so much I don't usually make it that far :D. Still, I imagine it will never end as Harley will keep him imprisoned and his regeneration super power will give her new playthings even after she breaks the old ones.
Simon was walking down the path to his house when he noticed something shiny in the bushes. Retrieving it, he saw it to be some sort of gravy boat. He wiped the dirt off it and the gravy boat began to billow blue smoke from the spout. This smoke whirled and gathered before revealing an enormous, blue skinned beautiful genie. From the waist down she was a cloud of smoke that funnelled into the gravy boat. Above the waist her well-muscled form was puncuated with the largest set of tits that Simon had ever seen. They stretched and pushed the straps of fabric that covered them to the breaking point.
“I am the great and powerful genie of the lamp,” spoke the genie.
“What lamp, wasn't that a gravy boat?” asked Simon.
The genie replied mockingly, “No, it wasn't a gravy boat. Ahem. I shall now grant you three wishes, master. Whatever your heart desires.”
“Well, to be honest, I've always been a little too skinny. How about making me a wrestler?”
“Your wish,” smiled the genie, “is my command!”
With that the genie grabbed each of her tits and slapped them together, making a cracking noise like thunder. Simon was blinded by a brilliant light and when it subsided, he was standing in a wrestling ring, staring out at an ocean of fans who were booing and hissing him.
“The following match is a Dumpster Match and it is for the Heavyweight Championship of the World! The first person to place their opponent in the dumpster is the winner. Already in the ring, the champion, weighing in at 225 pounds, Triple S!”
Simon threw up his fists to the booing crowd and framed the championship around his waist with his hands.
“And his opponent, weighing in at 165 pounds, accompanied to the ring by Mickie James, she is the Ninth Wonder of the World, Chyna!”
Chyna's music began as the female wrestler came down to the ring, dressed in studded leather and escorted by the insane lesbian Mickie James, dressed in a schoolgirl skirt, white top.
The referee took the belt from Simon as the bell rang. Simon was confused. He thought only men could fight for the championship. He decided to find out what the plan for the match was. After all, wrestling was fake, right? As he got closer to Chyna, he whispered, “Okay, what's the plan?”
Chyna locked up with him and brought her face close to his, “The plan is to hurt you very, very badly and take away your belt, your dignity, and...”
She brought her knee up in between his legs, crushing his balls against his pelvis. Simon bent over in pain, his face becoming buried in her cleavage. She took his face in one hand and leaned in, saying sweetly, “Your ability to re-produce.”
She released Simon, who fell over sideways onto the ground, cupping his injured groin. It seemed that wrestling wasn't as fake as he had thought. Chyna grabbed his head in a reverse headlock, lifting him to his feet, and delivered a DDT to the mat while the announcers commented on the fact that match had no disqualifications.
Chyna grabbed Simon by each of his ankles and raised them up, then put her foot down on his crotch, covering his fingers with her massive boot. She pulled back on his ankles and pushed her boot down, grinding his fingers through his balls to his pelvis. Simon could feel his nuts start to flatten between his knuckles as the amazon finished her work and walked away, asking for a microphone. The crowd cheered loudly as Simon rolled around on the ground in pain.
"I'm making an example out of the champion today. The time of man in wrestling is over. Now the ball's in my court. And if you're not careful, I'm going to rip it off and step on it!"
Chyna turned to find Simon wearily trying to pull himself up on the ropes while Mickie James heckled him from the outside and slapped his face. Chyna walked over behind him quickly and ducked to one knee, putting her forearm through his legs and uppercuting him from behind. The swiftness and power that she displayed uppercutting Simon's nuts in her trademark movie surprised the crowd, but Simon was much more surprised. His tight trunks offered no protection from the attack. As a matter of fact, they held his twin orbs as perfect targets for the Ninth Wonder of the World. He fell to the ground again in pain.
Chyna grabbed him by the hair and raised him to his feet. She put his left arm over her shoulder and grabbed his waist, lifting him in the air as if to drop him on his back behind her. However, she turned to the ropes he was using for leverage and dropped him on the top rope, crotch first. Simon's face became contorted as he grabbed the rope to try to relieve pressure. Chyna grabbed the rope and began to push and pull on it, bouncing Simon on the top rope by his nuts. Simon fell off the top rope and collapsed to the floor next to the chipper and cheering Mickie James.
Chyna's valet took the oppurtunity to spit in his face, receiving a cheer from the ground. Chyna motioned to Mickie James as she started to climb to the top turnbuckle. Mickie James went behind Simon and put a knee to his spine and grabbed his arms, pulling them behind her, putting him in a submission hold. Besides hurting Simon and clearing his hands of his groin, this distracted Simon from Chyna climbing the top rope. Chyna leaped towards Simon and gravity took hold and she fell about ten feet from the top turnbuckle the mat outside the ring. Chyna allowed her beefy legs to come down, pointing the balls of her feet at his now exposed groin.
Realizing that he had not been paying attention to Chyna, Simon saw her coming down and tried to close his legs, but he wasn't fast enough. About a half second before they closed, the tips of her boots drove into his nuts, pinning them to the mat.
The crunch that she felt below her was far better than the other shots she had landed so far. This large, strong man was the champion of all champions a minute ago, burst into tears and a high-pitched wail filled the arena as his balls were compressed almost to the breaking point. Chyna shut up his wailing by grabbing the back of his head and pushing her face into her sweaty crotch. The vibrations felt good and she twisted her boots when they got quieter. The entire crowd, male and female, winced in pain as she did her best to grind her feet into his soft spheres that felt like they were about to explode.
"STOP!" he screamed into her vagina, "YOU'RE CRUSHING THEM!"
Chyna smile and stepped off. She kicked him in the face and motioned for Mickie James to go to the top rope, prompting the crowd to cheer. Chyna kicked Simon onto his back while Mickie James climbed into the ring. Chyna squatted on top of Simon's face and faced his groin. She batted away his hands and grabbed his legs, bringing them up and trapping his arms back, exposing his groin. Mickie James looked down to Chyna and made a ripping motion with her hands. Chyna pulled back his legs more and grabbed at his groin. Simon panicked, unable to see anything but Chyna's crotch and ass. Chyna ripped at Simon's tights, tearing a hole that she rudely pulled his nut sack through. She grinned at how red and swollen his plums had become. When she put his legs back in the original 'V' position, his balls sagged and rested flatly on the mat in front of his crotch.
"Good," said Mickie James, "Now I can really work those things."
Mickie James leaped up and out from the rope. The crowd gasped at the risky maneuver and Chyna let out a cheer as she saw her falling towards them and realized what was going to happen. Mickie James folded her legs under her at the height of her leap and then fell the 12 or so feet to the mat.
She had aimed her attack perfectly. Her knees landed square between his wide spread legs. All her weight came down on his testicles. Simon’s face contorted inside Chyna's thighs into a silent scream, like he wanted to make a sound but nothing would come out. He sat up sharply, his body tensing, and his face grinding against Chyna's vagina, getting her off. Mickie was kneeling between his legs, her knees still on his balls, or what was left of them, her weight providing even more pressure. Chyna and Mickie stared into each other's eyes, Chyna's face aglow from ecstasy, orgasming on Simon's face, and Mickie James with a huge smile at what she had done to Simon's little babymakers. The two locked lips and kissed deeply. Chyna shuddered on Simon's face and Mickie shuddered on Simon's twin gonads.
After twenty or so long seconds, Simon finally found his voice and half screamed, half squealed at the terrible pain emanating from his nuts. The two women looked at him with disgust, and each got off of him. He rolled into a fetal position holding his testicles and crying.
Chyna left the champion and started to walk to the top of the ramp to retrieve the dumpster. Mickie James remained behind and rolled the champion onto his stomach. Stepping behind him, she slid her fingers along the crack of his ass and took hold of his exposed balls. Simon was already crying before she even did anything. Pulling her hand back from between his legs, his balls came with it. She ignored his pleas for mercy and wrapped both hands around his nut sack. As she did, she planted her feet in the crux behind his knees, standing there with her weight holding them down. Setting herself, she gritted her teeth and squeezed with all the might her tiny lean body could muster. While not a lot compared to Chyna, she was more than able to send intense pain surging through her male target.
"OH GOD NO!" he screamed as she applied more and more pressure. He tried to reach around behind him to grab her, but he was not limber enough to reach back that far thanks to the genie's muscles. All he could do was suffer. Squeezing even harder, she leaned back away from him allowing her back to arch. She was pulling at his sack with all her might, leaning back like a water skier, being held up only by his sex organs. His screams could barely be heard over the roar of the crowd. The crowd loved the show.
Simon was pounding at the mat, tapping out, trying to give up. Mickie gave his balls a twist as the announcers reminded the audience that there were no submissions in a dumpster match. She continued to pull and wrench until Chyna returned pushing the dumpster.
Chyna looked down at the mess her valet had made of the champion and burst out with laughing. She grabbed the half-conscious man by the hair and the rear of his trunks. She lifted up with her two hands, painfully pulling the trunks into Simon's asscrack and tearing out a chunk of hair. She rolled his body into the ring and sat him in the corner. She and Mickie James both climbed into the ring. As Simon sat groggily in the corner, his back to the turnbuckles and his legs spread, his testicles still exposed, Chyna put her back to his face and pulled up on her tights, revealing more of her round and muscular ass. She grabbed the top rope with each hand and delivered a powerful stinkface to Simon, nearly breaking his nose as she ground his face deeper and deeper into her asshole.
Across the ring, Mickie James got the crowd revved up and started to prepare herself to run. Running towards Chyna, she jumped and slide between Chyna's legs, driving the heel of her boot into Simon's groin with a powerful baseball slide! Instantly, Simon's right testicle gave way under the pressure and popped. Mickie James and Chyna were both aware of this and looked at each other with joy. The tip of Simon's nose actually entered Chyna's anal cavity because of his reaction, jutting forward with such force. However, he quickly passed out with his face between her asscheeks when she orgasmed and clenched them.
When Simon awoke, he could feel his body pulled in every direction. While ***********, Chyna had summoned the other women of the WWE who had joined them in the ring for their women's liberation. Stacy Keibler and Trish Stratus had Simon's arms spread. Victoria and Torrie had Simon's legs spread. Simon could only see Mickie James in front of him and couldn't see Chyna behind him, talking on the microphone.
"...nobody better get in the way of the Women's Wrestling Federation. Because when we say you don't have the balls to mess with us, we mean it!"
With that she dropped the microphone and kicked forward between Simon's legs. At the same time Mickie James kicked forwards between his legs in a stunt they had planned. Both of the soles of their boots perfectly met on either side of Simon's remaining love pea, crushing it immediately, resulting in a blood splatter and an empty scrotum, sending Simon back into unconsciousness.
Wanting to get in on the fun, Stacy Keibler and Trish Stratus devised their own torture. Stacy Keibler dropped to her knees and pulled Simon's penis through the hole in his tights and quickly started to jerk it. Stacy was well versed in handjobs and even in his pain, she quickly brought Simon to an erect state. Simon regained consciousness just soon enough to see Trish perform a chick kick to the tip of his penis while Stacy held it straight. The stiletto heel of her boot drove right into his pee hole and broke his penis in half. Simon screamed bloody murder, which Chyna shut up by grabbing his neck.
Her right hand grabbed him around the throat while the left hand found its way to his bloody crotch and nutmush. She dug her fingers into the flesh of his neck and sank them into his throat. Closing her fingers as much as she could, she wrapped her fingers around his windpipe, cutting off the air almost completely. Her left hand was no less brutal. Grabbing his remaining pulp, she squeezed and yanked the sack as hard as she could. Simon's body tensed and he tried to pull her hands away, but by this time she had a good grip and her fingers were embedded in his meat, at both ends. The more he pulled the worse it was for him. Lifting him up over her head by his groin and neck, Chyna carried Simon towards the ring ropes facing the dumpster. She momentarily brought him back, then threw him forward towards the dumpster, but held onto his scrotum, which ripped from his body like a paper towel. He landed on his head in the dumpster and was knocked out cold as Chyna spiked his scrotum and nutmush on the mat like a football and divas took turns stomping on it and making it splatter.
After a while Simon regained consciousness in the hospital. Groggily, he looked to his side to see his nurse. It was the genie from the lamp!
"This is going to feel a little uncomfortable," said the genie.
Simon saw in her right hand was a long probe. She jammed it rudely into his anus, causing him to roll his eyes back into his head. The genie smiled at Simon.
"Okay, so that didn't work out. Look, you've still got two more wishes. There must be a better way to be a tough guy than being a wrestler."
Wincing from the probe, Simon thought, "I wish I was just a fighter or a kung fu master or something, but somewhere there isn't Chyna."
The genie prepared to grant his wish, grabbing her tits.
"OH! And I want my balls back."
She nodded and slammed her tits together, producing a sound like thunder. A blinding light covered the room and Simon found himself in the character select screen of Fighters MegaMix.
Wish 2 – fighting game
As the screen to Fighter MegaMix came to life, the genie sat down at her X-Box with a bottle of soda next to her. She picked up the controller and pressed start, bringing her to the character select screen. Sixty fighters pulled from video games of all types spread out on the screen and she quickly chose her three-person team: Lara Croft from the Tomb Raider series, Sophitia from Soul Caliber, and Nina Williams from the Tekken series. She then chose her opponents: Akuma from Street Fighter, Mega Man from the Mega Man series, and Simon! As the screen showed the three pictures face to face, she took a sip of her soda and began to play.
The first two to fight were Akuma and Lara Croft. However, Akuma called in Mega Man for help, so they were both on screen when Lara Croft unleashed her ultimate attack, the revealing of a Medusa's head! Both turned to stone and were shattered when she shot them with her Desert Eagle. Simon appeared on screen, screaming, "What the hell was that?!"
"Hey, I can't help it if I picked better fighters for my team," replied the genie.
"Well, down to forward and punch always does a special move," said Simon.
Simon reeled back as if to throw a fireball, yelling, "HADOKEN!"
However, he instead threw a gold coin over Lara Croft's head. When Lara bent over to pick it up, Simon tiptoed over and grabbed the waistline of her panties as they stuck out from her pants and yanked hard up on them, pulling them up her ass crack and splitting her pussy lips with the fabric!
"A wedgie?! That's all I got?!" yelled Simon.
"I think you made her angry," replied the genie.
"LIGHTNING KNEE COMBO!" yelled Lara Croft, turning to face Simon. She grabbed his shoulders and broughter her right knee up into his groin hard, Simon's testicles falling on either side of her knee's polygon edge. She brought up her left knee hard into his groin, again splitting the twins. She brought her right knee up for the final hit of the combo, but the edge of her polygon caught his right testicle like a knife and Simon sunk to the ground, holding his groin.
"ATOMIC HEADBUTT!"
Lara grabbed Simon by the ankles and lifted her opponent's legs in the air, then dropped her head forward between them, slamming her forehead into her opponent's balls. As Simon lay on the ground, whimpering in pain, Lara resumed her default 'ready' animation.
"Call my lamp a gravy boat will you?" said the genie as she hit the button to tag in Nina Williams. Nina Williams lept onto the screen as Simon got to his feet. The genie held turbo and put in a button combination.
"BAD HABIT!" shouted Nina as she charged Simon. She slammed the pointy tip of her high heel into Simon's groin, pushing his left ball back into the tube it had descended from in the womb. When she dropped her foot, his nut squished out as well as he fell to the ground.
Nina walked up to Simon and put the toe of her high heel on his crotch. "TWISTED MIND!" she shouted as she put her hand on her hip and cocked her head. She then started to grind away at Simon's funbag like she was putting out a cigarette.
"Let's bring back out Lara Croft," said the genie, pressing the tag button. She noticed that Simon's health bar was halfway down.
Lara Croft came running in towards Simon, shouting, "PRIVATE POUNDER!"
Just before reaching Simon, she vaults off of her hands and flies at him, feet first and facing the floor. Her legs go between his and her ass hits him in the stomach, rolling him onto his back. Her legs hook his as she falls on top of him. Her ass lands on his face and her legs pull his legs back, leaving her face and fists directly above his crotch. Simon's face is enveloped by the firm, warm ass as the short shorts of Lara Croft pull up in this position. He can see the camoflague briefs that he so recently yanked on and his lips taste her labia, split on either side of the cotton. For a brief moment, Simon forgets his pain, but the genie quickly reminds him by mashing the punch button. Lara Croft delivers four alternating punches with cold and emotionless efficency to his nutsack, before flipping off backwards gracefully, and resuming the 'ready' animation.
Lara Croft suddenly explodes and dies!
"Pbbbbbbbfffftttt!!! WHAT?!" shouts the genie as she spits out her soda at the screen.
Simon drops a grenade pin as he staggers to his feet, holding his battered nuts. He is far from gloating, but the grenades on Lara Croft's belt had been too easy of a target.
"That's it," replied the genie, hitting the tag button, "I'm bringing out Sophitia!"
Sophitia appears in her gladiator costume. Suddenly, the screen darkens.
"What's going on?!" yells Simon.
"Cheat codes!" replies the genie, banging on the buttons. "I'm enabling 'Weapon Master' Sophitia so she can use any weapon I want her to!"
The screen resumes its brightness and Sophitia has every type of gun, martial arts weapon, or sword imaginable. She is lined with explosives and her eyes have gone blood red. Sophitia draws an eight foot long polearm with a blade at the end.
"OPENING TREASURE!" shouts Sophitia as she puts the polearm between Simon's legs. She wiggles it back and forth, spreading his legs, then pulls it up hard into his crotch, crushing his waiting nuts between the wood pole and his own digitized pelvis.
"TRIPLE ATTACK!"
Sophitia closes the distance to Simon and kicks Simon's left ankle out, spreading his legs again, then knees him in the nuts, the metal kneecap plating crushing his balls. Then she spun around, producing a cattle prod from her weaponry and touches it to Simon's balls! There's a blast of electricity and Simon screams as his nuts are electrocuted! Suddenly, Sophitia explodes and dies!
"DAMN IT!" shouts the genie, realizing that her code gave Sophitia grenades like Lara Croft's.
Simon coughs, laying on the ground, "I... I... win... fatality..." He then vomits on the ground next to him.
"I think you forgot that I only tagged out Nina. And my special move is all charged up," smiled the genie as Nina Williams returned to the screen.
"NINA NUTCRUSHER!" shouted Nina as she charged the rising Simon. She grabbed Simon by each arm and pulled him into her, quickly slamming the thin part of her shin, just about the ankle, into his nuts. Her foot stuck out in the back between his legs. As Simon looked at her, blinking blankly, too hurt to make a noise, she lowered her foot. Nina held him by the chin, looking at his face, as if to savor the expression of pain.
"YOU LOSE!" shouts an announcer as the last of Simon's health bar disappears. The screen changes to an image of Simon, beaten and bloody and a victorious Nina, with the phrase "Maybe I'll use your balls as ear rings!" typed underneath.
"I love fighting games," said the genie. The screen went to a continue screen with Simon above the countdown from ten as "Continue?" was written above his head.
"Get me out of here!" Simon shouted to the genie.
"Wish yourself somewhere," replied the genie, sipping her soda.
Wish 3 – superpowers
"Fine, you want to try to outsmart me? I wish I was a superhero who was invulnerable to harm and pain!" smirked Simon.
The genie thought for a moment and said, "Okay."
"Okay? What do you mean okay?"
The genie grabbed her two enormous breasts and slapped them together. There was a crack of thunder and a blinding light and Simon found himself clad in bright yellow spandex and a long red cape in a bright and shining metropolis. Impressed, but suspicious, he walked over to a light post and punched it. He felt no pain at the impact, which left his knuckles impressed on the metal.
"I'm a superhero!" yelled Simon.
"Now remember," the genie's voice reverberated in his head, "you're out of wishes, so you're stuck here forever."
"Forever? So what! I'm invulnerable. Nothing can go wrong!"
At that moment, an alarm sounded down the road at the bank. A red convertible came screaming down the road, followed by a line of police cars. Simon leaped out towards the car, expecting to fly above it, but crash landed in the back seat on top of a large canvas sack of bills.
"Oof!" came out of Simon as he hit the bags and was thrown against the back of the seat by the speed. He looked to the front seat to see two confused and surprised women in costume looking back at him. They were both young women and very pretty. The driver was clearly the Scarlet Witch, a beautiful mutant with the power to affect probabilities. The passenger, who looked at Simon grinning was Harley Quinn. Her white greasepaint and domino mask betrayed her frivilous nature as she turned around to kick Simon in the head.
"Hey, ass, gas, or grass! No free rides!" she said as she kicked him. "OW!"
"Oh right," thought Simon, "I'm the superhero, here!"
Simon sat up, "Stop the car! You're both under arrest!"
Scarlet Witch snapped her fingers, affecting the probability that Simon would suddenly fall asleep. As Simon fell to the seat, he realized that invulnerability might not have been enough of a wish.
Simon awoke at what could only be deduced as one of the Joker's old hideouts. There were toys and electronic equipment around and the dilapitated warehouse had only the faintest trappings of livability. Simon yawned and stretched and realized where he was. Around his wrists were shackles, chained to the floor. At a table ahead of him, Harley Quinn and Scarlet Witch sat counting money.
"You, know, I think I might get boob implants. Something really funny, like size quadruple Z, haha!" laughed Harley Quinn, who then noticed Simon waking up. "Oh look, Superballs is up!"
"Superballs?" thought Simon. He looked down at his chest and sure enough, there was the name "Superballs" plastered across his chest. No doubt a parting gift from the genie to entice supervillains to aim for his genitals. But he was invulnerable, right?
"Hey, Sexy McStudly! What kind of a superhero names himself "Superballs" anyway?" Harley said as she sauntered over. Scarlet Witch remained at the table, counting money. Harley got down on her knees to be eye level with the kneeling hero.
"So, just how super are they?" asked Harley as she pressed the palm of her hand up against his crotch. She started to rub up and down, the spandex stretching more and more as his cock hardened to her touch and the outline of his dick and cum-laden balls became clearer. Snaking her fingers upwards to his waistline, she looked in his eyes and licked her bright red lips.
Reaching down under his waistband, Harley felt his hard cock and pushed it to one side. She then took his left nut in her hands, closing them around the small orb. Quickly and harshly she squeezed, slowly increasing the pressure. Simon’s body began shaking and convulsing, but he was unable to even lift a finger to stop her. The two of them were looking each other eye to eye. He was trying to beg for her to stop but couldn’t form any words, just noises. As she increased the pressure, she dug her nails into his nut. “Just a bit more,” she told him with a smile. After another few seconds, she gave one final squeeze and felt his nut explode in her hand. "WHOO! POP goes the weasel!" cried out Harley.
Simon knees buckled. His arms and legs stiffened and his torso began flopping up and down as his body tried to deal with the violation. He was only partly aware of what she had done, but his body resisted it as best it could.
Harley then grabbed his limp cock and wrenched it several times side to side as hard as she could. Letting it go, she could tell that the meat had been torn inside and it began to swell. ‘Good,’ she thought, ‘He’ll never use that again.’
Pleased with herself, Harley stood back and observed her handiwork with her hands on her hips. To her amazement, his pop testicle reformed. Moments later, the bruising on his penis had vanished.
"Wazzitatunit?" exclaimed Harley, "Did you do this, Red?"
"Do what?" asked Scarlet Witch as she walked over to observe 'Superballs'.
"I knocked out his knacker but nut knackered back!"
"What?" asked Scarlet Witch.
"What she's trying to say," said Simon as he caught his breath, "is that I'm invincible." Simon could feel the pain slowly leaving his body has he regenerated. "There's nothing you can do to hurt me so you might as well give up!" He was pleased with the authority in his voice.
Simon was walking down the path to his house when he noticed something shiny in the bushes. Retrieving it, he saw it to be some sort of gravy boat. He wiped the dirt off it and the gravy boat began to billow blue smoke from the spout. This smoke whirled and gathered before revealing an enormous, blue skinned beautiful genie. From the waist down she was a cloud of smoke that funnelled into the gravy boat. Above the waist her well-muscled form was puncuated with the largest set of tits that Simon had ever seen. They stretched and pushed the straps of fabric that covered them to the breaking point.
“I am the great and powerful genie of the lamp,” spoke the genie.
“What lamp, wasn't that a gravy boat?” asked Simon.
The genie replied mockingly, “No, it wasn't a gravy boat. Ahem. I shall now grant you three wishes, master. Whatever your heart desires.”
“Well, to be honest, I've always been a little too skinny. How about making me a wrestler?”
“Your wish,” smiled the genie, “is my command!”
With that the genie grabbed each of her tits and slapped them together, making a cracking noise like thunder. Simon was blinded by a brilliant light and when it subsided, he was standing in a wrestling ring, staring out at an ocean of fans who were booing and hissing him.
“The following match is a Dumpster Match and it is for the Heavyweight Championship of the World! The first person to place their opponent in the dumpster is the winner. Already in the ring, the champion, weighing in at 225 pounds, Triple S!”
Simon threw up his fists to the booing crowd and framed the championship around his waist with his hands.
“And his opponent, weighing in at 165 pounds, accompanied to the ring by Mickie James, she is the Ninth Wonder of the World, Chyna!”
Chyna's music began as the female wrestler came down to the ring, dressed in studded leather and escorted by the insane lesbian Mickie James, dressed in a schoolgirl skirt, white top.
The referee took the belt from Simon as the bell rang. Simon was confused. He thought only men could fight for the championship. He decided to find out what the plan for the match was. After all, wrestling was fake, right? As he got closer to Chyna, he whispered, “Okay, what's the plan?”
Chyna locked up with him and brought her face close to his, “The plan is to hurt you very, very badly and take away your belt, your dignity, and...”
She brought her knee up in between his legs, crushing his balls against his pelvis. Simon bent over in pain, his face becoming buried in her cleavage. She took his face in one hand and leaned in, saying sweetly, “Your ability to re-produce.”
She released Simon, who fell over sideways onto the ground, cupping his injured groin. It seemed that wrestling wasn't as fake as he had thought. Chyna grabbed his head in a reverse headlock, lifting him to his feet, and delivered a DDT to the mat while the announcers commented on the fact that match had no disqualifications.
Chyna grabbed Simon by each of his ankles and raised them up, then put her foot down on his crotch, covering his fingers with her massive boot. She pulled back on his ankles and pushed her boot down, grinding his fingers through his balls to his pelvis. Simon could feel his nuts start to flatten between his knuckles as the amazon finished her work and walked away, asking for a microphone. The crowd cheered loudly as Simon rolled around on the ground in pain.
"I'm making an example out of the champion today. The time of man in wrestling is over. Now the ball's in my court. And if you're not careful, I'm going to rip it off and step on it!"
Chyna turned to find Simon wearily trying to pull himself up on the ropes while Mickie James heckled him from the outside and slapped his face. Chyna walked over behind him quickly and ducked to one knee, putting her forearm through his legs and uppercuting him from behind. The swiftness and power that she displayed uppercutting Simon's nuts in her trademark movie surprised the crowd, but Simon was much more surprised. His tight trunks offered no protection from the attack. As a matter of fact, they held his twin orbs as perfect targets for the Ninth Wonder of the World. He fell to the ground again in pain.
Chyna grabbed him by the hair and raised him to his feet. She put his left arm over her shoulder and grabbed his waist, lifting him in the air as if to drop him on his back behind her. However, she turned to the ropes he was using for leverage and dropped him on the top rope, crotch first. Simon's face became contorted as he grabbed the rope to try to relieve pressure. Chyna grabbed the rope and began to push and pull on it, bouncing Simon on the top rope by his nuts. Simon fell off the top rope and collapsed to the floor next to the chipper and cheering Mickie James.
Chyna's valet took the oppurtunity to spit in his face, receiving a cheer from the ground. Chyna motioned to Mickie James as she started to climb to the top turnbuckle. Mickie James went behind Simon and put a knee to his spine and grabbed his arms, pulling them behind her, putting him in a submission hold. Besides hurting Simon and clearing his hands of his groin, this distracted Simon from Chyna climbing the top rope. Chyna leaped towards Simon and gravity took hold and she fell about ten feet from the top turnbuckle the mat outside the ring. Chyna allowed her beefy legs to come down, pointing the balls of her feet at his now exposed groin.
Realizing that he had not been paying attention to Chyna, Simon saw her coming down and tried to close his legs, but he wasn't fast enough. About a half second before they closed, the tips of her boots drove into his nuts, pinning them to the mat.
The crunch that she felt below her was far better than the other shots she had landed so far. This large, strong man was the champion of all champions a minute ago, burst into tears and a high-pitched wail filled the arena as his balls were compressed almost to the breaking point. Chyna shut up his wailing by grabbing the back of his head and pushing her face into her sweaty crotch. The vibrations felt good and she twisted her boots when they got quieter. The entire crowd, male and female, winced in pain as she did her best to grind her feet into his soft spheres that felt like they were about to explode.
"STOP!" he screamed into her vagina, "YOU'RE CRUSHING THEM!"
Chyna smile and stepped off. She kicked him in the face and motioned for Mickie James to go to the top rope, prompting the crowd to cheer. Chyna kicked Simon onto his back while Mickie James climbed into the ring. Chyna squatted on top of Simon's face and faced his groin. She batted away his hands and grabbed his legs, bringing them up and trapping his arms back, exposing his groin. Mickie James looked down to Chyna and made a ripping motion with her hands. Chyna pulled back his legs more and grabbed at his groin. Simon panicked, unable to see anything but Chyna's crotch and ass. Chyna ripped at Simon's tights, tearing a hole that she rudely pulled his nut sack through. She grinned at how red and swollen his plums had become. When she put his legs back in the original 'V' position, his balls sagged and rested flatly on the mat in front of his crotch.
"Good," said Mickie James, "Now I can really work those things."
Mickie James leaped up and out from the rope. The crowd gasped at the risky maneuver and Chyna let out a cheer as she saw her falling towards them and realized what was going to happen. Mickie James folded her legs under her at the height of her leap and then fell the 12 or so feet to the mat.
She had aimed her attack perfectly. Her knees landed square between his wide spread legs. All her weight came down on his testicles. Simon’s face contorted inside Chyna's thighs into a silent scream, like he wanted to make a sound but nothing would come out. He sat up sharply, his body tensing, and his face grinding against Chyna's vagina, getting her off. Mickie was kneeling between his legs, her knees still on his balls, or what was left of them, her weight providing even more pressure. Chyna and Mickie stared into each other's eyes, Chyna's face aglow from ecstasy, orgasming on Simon's face, and Mickie James with a huge smile at what she had done to Simon's little babymakers. The two locked lips and kissed deeply. Chyna shuddered on Simon's face and Mickie shuddered on Simon's twin gonads.
After twenty or so long seconds, Simon finally found his voice and half screamed, half squealed at the terrible pain emanating from his nuts. The two women looked at him with disgust, and each got off of him. He rolled into a fetal position holding his testicles and crying.
Chyna left the champion and started to walk to the top of the ramp to retrieve the dumpster. Mickie James remained behind and rolled the champion onto his stomach. Stepping behind him, she slid her fingers along the crack of his ass and took hold of his exposed balls. Simon was already crying before she even did anything. Pulling her hand back from between his legs, his balls came with it. She ignored his pleas for mercy and wrapped both hands around his nut sack. As she did, she planted her feet in the crux behind his knees, standing there with her weight holding them down. Setting herself, she gritted her teeth and squeezed with all the might her tiny lean body could muster. While not a lot compared to Chyna, she was more than able to send intense pain surging through her male target.
"OH GOD NO!" he screamed as she applied more and more pressure. He tried to reach around behind him to grab her, but he was not limber enough to reach back that far thanks to the genie's muscles. All he could do was suffer. Squeezing even harder, she leaned back away from him allowing her back to arch. She was pulling at his sack with all her might, leaning back like a water skier, being held up only by his sex organs. His screams could barely be heard over the roar of the crowd. The crowd loved the show.
Simon was pounding at the mat, tapping out, trying to give up. Mickie gave his balls a twist as the announcers reminded the audience that there were no submissions in a dumpster match. She continued to pull and wrench until Chyna returned pushing the dumpster.
Chyna looked down at the mess her valet had made of the champion and burst out with laughing. She grabbed the half-conscious man by the hair and the rear of his trunks. She lifted up with her two hands, painfully pulling the trunks into Simon's asscrack and tearing out a chunk of hair. She rolled his body into the ring and sat him in the corner. She and Mickie James both climbed into the ring. As Simon sat groggily in the corner, his back to the turnbuckles and his legs spread, his testicles still exposed, Chyna put her back to his face and pulled up on her tights, revealing more of her round and muscular ass. She grabbed the top rope with each hand and delivered a powerful stinkface to Simon, nearly breaking his nose as she ground his face deeper and deeper into her asshole.
Across the ring, Mickie James got the crowd revved up and started to prepare herself to run. Running towards Chyna, she jumped and slide between Chyna's legs, driving the heel of her boot into Simon's groin with a powerful baseball slide! Instantly, Simon's right testicle gave way under the pressure and popped. Mickie James and Chyna were both aware of this and looked at each other with joy. The tip of Simon's nose actually entered Chyna's anal cavity because of his reaction, jutting forward with such force. However, he quickly passed out with his face between her asscheeks when she orgasmed and clenched them.
When Simon awoke, he could feel his body pulled in every direction. While ***********, Chyna had summoned the other women of the WWE who had joined them in the ring for their women's liberation. Stacy Keibler and Trish Stratus had Simon's arms spread. Victoria and Torrie had Simon's legs spread. Simon could only see Mickie James in front of him and couldn't see Chyna behind him, talking on the microphone.
"...nobody better get in the way of the Women's Wrestling Federation. Because when we say you don't have the balls to mess with us, we mean it!"
With that she dropped the microphone and kicked forward between Simon's legs. At the same time Mickie James kicked forwards between his legs in a stunt they had planned. Both of the soles of their boots perfectly met on either side of Simon's remaining love pea, crushing it immediately, resulting in a blood splatter and an empty scrotum, sending Simon back into unconsciousness.
Wanting to get in on the fun, Stacy Keibler and Trish Stratus devised their own torture. Stacy Keibler dropped to her knees and pulled Simon's penis through the hole in his tights and quickly started to jerk it. Stacy was well versed in handjobs and even in his pain, she quickly brought Simon to an erect state. Simon regained consciousness just soon enough to see Trish perform a chick kick to the tip of his penis while Stacy held it straight. The stiletto heel of her boot drove right into his pee hole and broke his penis in half. Simon screamed bloody murder, which Chyna shut up by grabbing his neck.
Her right hand grabbed him around the throat while the left hand found its way to his bloody crotch and nutmush. She dug her fingers into the flesh of his neck and sank them into his throat. Closing her fingers as much as she could, she wrapped her fingers around his windpipe, cutting off the air almost completely. Her left hand was no less brutal. Grabbing his remaining pulp, she squeezed and yanked the sack as hard as she could. Simon's body tensed and he tried to pull her hands away, but by this time she had a good grip and her fingers were embedded in his meat, at both ends. The more he pulled the worse it was for him. Lifting him up over her head by his groin and neck, Chyna carried Simon towards the ring ropes facing the dumpster. She momentarily brought him back, then threw him forward towards the dumpster, but held onto his scrotum, which ripped from his body like a paper towel. He landed on his head in the dumpster and was knocked out cold as Chyna spiked his scrotum and nutmush on the mat like a football and divas took turns stomping on it and making it splatter.
After a while Simon regained consciousness in the hospital. Groggily, he looked to his side to see his nurse. It was the genie from the lamp!
"This is going to feel a little uncomfortable," said the genie.
Simon saw in her right hand was a long probe. She jammed it rudely into his anus, causing him to roll his eyes back into his head. The genie smiled at Simon.
"Okay, so that didn't work out. Look, you've still got two more wishes. There must be a better way to be a tough guy than being a wrestler."
Wincing from the probe, Simon thought, "I wish I was just a fighter or a kung fu master or something, but somewhere there isn't Chyna."
The genie prepared to grant his wish, grabbing her tits.
"OH! And I want my balls back."
She nodded and slammed her tits together, producing a sound like thunder. A blinding light covered the room and Simon found himself in the character select screen of Fighters MegaMix.
Wish 2 – fighting game
As the screen to Fighter MegaMix came to life, the genie sat down at her X-Box with a bottle of soda next to her. She picked up the controller and pressed start, bringing her to the character select screen. Sixty fighters pulled from video games of all types spread out on the screen and she quickly chose her three-person team: Lara Croft from the Tomb Raider series, Sophitia from Soul Caliber, and Nina Williams from the Tekken series. She then chose her opponents: Akuma from Street Fighter, Mega Man from the Mega Man series, and Simon! As the screen showed the three pictures face to face, she took a sip of her soda and began to play.
The first two to fight were Akuma and Lara Croft. However, Akuma called in Mega Man for help, so they were both on screen when Lara Croft unleashed her ultimate attack, the revealing of a Medusa's head! Both turned to stone and were shattered when she shot them with her Desert Eagle. Simon appeared on screen, screaming, "What the hell was that?!"
"Hey, I can't help it if I picked better fighters for my team," replied the genie.
"Well, down to forward and punch always does a special move," said Simon.
Simon reeled back as if to throw a fireball, yelling, "HADOKEN!"
However, he instead threw a gold coin over Lara Croft's head. When Lara bent over to pick it up, Simon tiptoed over and grabbed the waistline of her panties as they stuck out from her pants and yanked hard up on them, pulling them up her ass crack and splitting her pussy lips with the fabric!
"A wedgie?! That's all I got?!" yelled Simon.
"I think you made her angry," replied the genie.
"LIGHTNING KNEE COMBO!" yelled Lara Croft, turning to face Simon. She grabbed his shoulders and broughter her right knee up into his groin hard, Simon's testicles falling on either side of her knee's polygon edge. She brought up her left knee hard into his groin, again splitting the twins. She brought her right knee up for the final hit of the combo, but the edge of her polygon caught his right testicle like a knife and Simon sunk to the ground, holding his groin.
"ATOMIC HEADBUTT!"
Lara grabbed Simon by the ankles and lifted her opponent's legs in the air, then dropped her head forward between them, slamming her forehead into her opponent's balls. As Simon lay on the ground, whimpering in pain, Lara resumed her default 'ready' animation.
"Call my lamp a gravy boat will you?" said the genie as she hit the button to tag in Nina Williams. Nina Williams lept onto the screen as Simon got to his feet. The genie held turbo and put in a button combination.
"BAD HABIT!" shouted Nina as she charged Simon. She slammed the pointy tip of her high heel into Simon's groin, pushing his left ball back into the tube it had descended from in the womb. When she dropped her foot, his nut squished out as well as he fell to the ground.
Nina walked up to Simon and put the toe of her high heel on his crotch. "TWISTED MIND!" she shouted as she put her hand on her hip and cocked her head. She then started to grind away at Simon's funbag like she was putting out a cigarette.
"Let's bring back out Lara Croft," said the genie, pressing the tag button. She noticed that Simon's health bar was halfway down.
Lara Croft came running in towards Simon, shouting, "PRIVATE POUNDER!"
Just before reaching Simon, she vaults off of her hands and flies at him, feet first and facing the floor. Her legs go between his and her ass hits him in the stomach, rolling him onto his back. Her legs hook his as she falls on top of him. Her ass lands on his face and her legs pull his legs back, leaving her face and fists directly above his crotch. Simon's face is enveloped by the firm, warm ass as the short shorts of Lara Croft pull up in this position. He can see the camoflague briefs that he so recently yanked on and his lips taste her labia, split on either side of the cotton. For a brief moment, Simon forgets his pain, but the genie quickly reminds him by mashing the punch button. Lara Croft delivers four alternating punches with cold and emotionless efficency to his nutsack, before flipping off backwards gracefully, and resuming the 'ready' animation.
Lara Croft suddenly explodes and dies!
"Pbbbbbbbfffftttt!!! WHAT?!" shouts the genie as she spits out her soda at the screen.
Simon drops a grenade pin as he staggers to his feet, holding his battered nuts. He is far from gloating, but the grenades on Lara Croft's belt had been too easy of a target.
"That's it," replied the genie, hitting the tag button, "I'm bringing out Sophitia!"
Sophitia appears in her gladiator costume. Suddenly, the screen darkens.
"What's going on?!" yells Simon.
"Cheat codes!" replies the genie, banging on the buttons. "I'm enabling 'Weapon Master' Sophitia so she can use any weapon I want her to!"
The screen resumes its brightness and Sophitia has every type of gun, martial arts weapon, or sword imaginable. She is lined with explosives and her eyes have gone blood red. Sophitia draws an eight foot long polearm with a blade at the end.
"OPENING TREASURE!" shouts Sophitia as she puts the polearm between Simon's legs. She wiggles it back and forth, spreading his legs, then pulls it up hard into his crotch, crushing his waiting nuts between the wood pole and his own digitized pelvis.
"TRIPLE ATTACK!"
Sophitia closes the distance to Simon and kicks Simon's left ankle out, spreading his legs again, then knees him in the nuts, the metal kneecap plating crushing his balls. Then she spun around, producing a cattle prod from her weaponry and touches it to Simon's balls! There's a blast of electricity and Simon screams as his nuts are electrocuted! Suddenly, Sophitia explodes and dies!
"DAMN IT!" shouts the genie, realizing that her code gave Sophitia grenades like Lara Croft's.
Simon coughs, laying on the ground, "I... I... win... fatality..." He then vomits on the ground next to him.
"I think you forgot that I only tagged out Nina. And my special move is all charged up," smiled the genie as Nina Williams returned to the screen.
"NINA NUTCRUSHER!" shouted Nina as she charged the rising Simon. She grabbed Simon by each arm and pulled him into her, quickly slamming the thin part of her shin, just about the ankle, into his nuts. Her foot stuck out in the back between his legs. As Simon looked at her, blinking blankly, too hurt to make a noise, she lowered her foot. Nina held him by the chin, looking at his face, as if to savor the expression of pain.
"YOU LOSE!" shouts an announcer as the last of Simon's health bar disappears. The screen changes to an image of Simon, beaten and bloody and a victorious Nina, with the phrase "Maybe I'll use your balls as ear rings!" typed underneath.
"I love fighting games," said the genie. The screen went to a continue screen with Simon above the countdown from ten as "Continue?" was written above his head.
"Get me out of here!" Simon shouted to the genie.
"Wish yourself somewhere," replied the genie, sipping her soda.
Wish 3 – superpowers
"Fine, you want to try to outsmart me? I wish I was a superhero who was invulnerable to harm and pain!" smirked Simon.
The genie thought for a moment and said, "Okay."
"Okay? What do you mean okay?"
The genie grabbed her two enormous breasts and slapped them together. There was a crack of thunder and a blinding light and Simon found himself clad in bright yellow spandex and a long red cape in a bright and shining metropolis. Impressed, but suspicious, he walked over to a light post and punched it. He felt no pain at the impact, which left his knuckles impressed on the metal.
"I'm a superhero!" yelled Simon.
"Now remember," the genie's voice reverberated in his head, "you're out of wishes, so you're stuck here forever."
"Forever? So what! I'm invulnerable. Nothing can go wrong!"
At that moment, an alarm sounded down the road at the bank. A red convertible came screaming down the road, followed by a line of police cars. Simon leaped out towards the car, expecting to fly above it, but crash landed in the back seat on top of a large canvas sack of bills.
"Oof!" came out of Simon as he hit the bags and was thrown against the back of the seat by the speed. He looked to the front seat to see two confused and surprised women in costume looking back at him. They were both young women and very pretty. The driver was clearly the Scarlet Witch, a beautiful mutant with the power to affect probabilities. The passenger, who looked at Simon grinning was Harley Quinn. Her white greasepaint and domino mask betrayed her frivilous nature as she turned around to kick Simon in the head.
"Hey, ass, gas, or grass! No free rides!" she said as she kicked him. "OW!"
"Oh right," thought Simon, "I'm the superhero, here!"
Simon sat up, "Stop the car! You're both under arrest!"
Scarlet Witch snapped her fingers, affecting the probability that Simon would suddenly fall asleep. As Simon fell to the seat, he realized that invulnerability might not have been enough of a wish.
Simon awoke at what could only be deduced as one of the Joker's old hideouts. There were toys and electronic equipment around and the dilapitated warehouse had only the faintest trappings of livability. Simon yawned and stretched and realized where he was. Around his wrists were shackles, chained to the floor. At a table ahead of him, Harley Quinn and Scarlet Witch sat counting money.
"You, know, I think I might get boob implants. Something really funny, like size quadruple Z, haha!" laughed Harley Quinn, who then noticed Simon waking up. "Oh look, Superballs is up!"
"Superballs?" thought Simon. He looked down at his chest and sure enough, there was the name "Superballs" plastered across his chest. No doubt a parting gift from the genie to entice supervillains to aim for his genitals. But he was invulnerable, right?
"Hey, Sexy McStudly! What kind of a superhero names himself "Superballs" anyway?" Harley said as she sauntered over. Scarlet Witch remained at the table, counting money. Harley got down on her knees to be eye level with the kneeling hero.
"So, just how super are they?" asked Harley as she pressed the palm of her hand up against his crotch. She started to rub up and down, the spandex stretching more and more as his cock hardened to her touch and the outline of his dick and cum-laden balls became clearer. Snaking her fingers upwards to his waistline, she looked in his eyes and licked her bright red lips.
Reaching down under his waistband, Harley felt his hard cock and pushed it to one side. She then took his left nut in her hands, closing them around the small orb. Quickly and harshly she squeezed, slowly increasing the pressure. Simon’s body began shaking and convulsing, but he was unable to even lift a finger to stop her. The two of them were looking each other eye to eye. He was trying to beg for her to stop but couldn’t form any words, just noises. As she increased the pressure, she dug her nails into his nut. “Just a bit more,” she told him with a smile. After another few seconds, she gave one final squeeze and felt his nut explode in her hand. "WHOO! POP goes the weasel!" cried out Harley.
Simon knees buckled. His arms and legs stiffened and his torso began flopping up and down as his body tried to deal with the violation. He was only partly aware of what she had done, but his body resisted it as best it could.
Harley then grabbed his limp cock and wrenched it several times side to side as hard as she could. Letting it go, she could tell that the meat had been torn inside and it began to swell. ‘Good,’ she thought, ‘He’ll never use that again.’
Pleased with herself, Harley stood back and observed her handiwork with her hands on her hips. To her amazement, his pop testicle reformed. Moments later, the bruising on his penis had vanished.
"Wazzitatunit?" exclaimed Harley, "Did you do this, Red?"
"Do what?" asked Scarlet Witch as she walked over to observe 'Superballs'.
"I knocked out his knacker but nut knackered back!"
"What?" asked Scarlet Witch.
"What she's trying to say," said Simon as he caught his breath, "is that I'm invincible." Simon could feel the pain slowly leaving his body has he regenerated. "There's nothing you can do to hurt me so you might as well give up!" He was pleased with the authority in his voice.