could victims of [childhood] abuse get something therapeutic from ballbusting a man

[catweazle]

ie: an adult woman who [in her childhood] had endured a male's violence towards her, or psychological & sexual abuse.

....or do you think that:


a) ...if her desire to ballbust him was linked to those experiences, she might lose controll and risk using more force than she intended?


b)... or that a woman with that personal history would get nothing out of it, if she knew that ballbusting a guy was going to be a turn-on for him?

[spaceclubba]

ie: an adult woman who [in her childhood] had endured a male's violence towards her, or psychological & sexual abuse.

....or do you think that:


a) ...if her desire to ballbust him was linked to those experiences, she might lose controll and risk using more force than she intended?


b)... or that a woman with that personal history would get nothing out of it, if she knew that ballbusting a guy was going to be a turn-on for him?



i highly doubt it.

[snack marvin]

An interesting question. In my opinion both could result. First, when the man obviously enjoys being ballbusted, she could perhaps get the feeling of being used solely for his pleasure, what could mean a repeat of the original abusive experience.

We can see it in some BB-videos: I remember a certain "slave" who has always a very annoying expression of joy and expectation on his face, which is ridiculous for the ballbusting scene – and shows directly that he uses the girls for his pleasure. I'm always happy if I don't have to see this "slave".
So such behavior will be even more annoying and molesting for a woman with an abusive experience in her past lifetime.

On the other hand – inside a trustful personal relationship – I think it's perfectly possible that women with experiences of abuse and powerlessness enjoy to turn the tables. The more when there is a playful personal relationship with intimacy and trust.

But after all: **** and sexual abuse are serious psychological traumas which should be treated with according to professional standards for avoiding harm for the women as far as possible...

[Julie18nz]

Personally knowing a few girls that have been abused as children, I can say "NO" :)

[snack marvin]

I once knew a woman – a former girlfriend, long, long years ago when I started studying – who was abused as a child and she was into ball grabbing and squeezing (while I was not). She liked to make me nervous and was grabbing my balls several times, saying "shall I squeeze?"...
Myself I was not into this whole ballbusting/squeezing thing at these times and didn't like it at all...

Perhaps I should say that she participated in a womens self defense class and enjoyed feeling "strong". It's long long years ago, but it was the first time that a lady was "after my balls"... ;)

[Castratrix's pet]

I don't think it works the way it is suggested in the opening post.

What child abuse does to a child emotionally and psychologically is very complicated and often very deep inside of them.

Ballbusting a man is no more a valid therapy for a woman who was abused as a child or abused as an adult for that matter, than it would be for her to bust up a clay statue of a man or a clay figurine of a man's cock and balls. It just doesn't work that way. In fact having her ballbust a man as therapy for her might even make her situation and her psychological condition worse.

What she really needs is help with a trained therapist or psychologist or psychiatrist who really knows what they are doing.

[mick_sl8ter]

Personally knowing a few girls that have been abused as children, I can say "NO" :)
How personally ? as in the girl you see in the mirror ?

[Just_Another]

How personally ? as in the girl you see in the mirror ?


I'm guessing that if that was true then she would have simply said that she had personal experience, without adding the thing about friends. If she had wanted us to know, that is. In which case, I think it might be best not to ask that question.

[jessica]

This assumes that all victims of abuse are girls. Of course they are not. Young boys are abused by women as well.

It also just perpetuates violence as in most child abuse cases. The victim might pass on these traits to their offspring.

[snack marvin]

This assumes that all victims of abuse are girls. Of course they are not. Young boys are abused by women as well.

It also just perpetuates violence as in most child abuse cases. The victim might pass on these traits to their offspring.

I agree.

I think that fetish in general is not the adequate answer for coping with trauma – while a professional trauma treatment may be.

While a sexual trauma is often characterized by "loss of control" and helplessness, trauma therapy accordingly tries to support a "regaining of control" and an "empowerment" – as one of several measures.

As julie18nz said, women she knows didn't like the idea of ballbusting at all. Perhaps because it remembered them to the sex-related violence, they had to endure for themselves.

After all, I think that probably every kind of fetish has to do with past lifetime experiences, not necessarily traumatic. And when boys too are abused sometimes by women (or men) – is there a potential relation to sado-masochistic activities in general or ballbusting in particular...?

Personally I think that there is not necessarily a relation between abuse or trauma and SM or ballbusting. But is there a relation to lifetime experiences...?