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dzwitch
01-08-2009, 06:08 PM
Well, my first tale in English - not my first tongue - Enjoy it!

A not-so-horror tale

Greta kicked Adam's balls so hard that morning, that Adam fell crying and moaning in a way that even Greta could not stand much time.

- Do you want me to take you to the hospital? - asked Greta, really worried by the unexpected situation.

- Ohh...yes, yes, please - whispered Adam almost ***********

When they arrived to the hospital, Ms. Jennifer, a Doctor, began to examine Adam's crotch.

- Oh, my god! What is this? It seems he had a fight or something, I should report it to the police inmediatly!

- No, please - blushed Greta, you know...

- I know what? - Asked Ms. Jennifer

- Well, we were just playing, he wanted me to... to... - Greta couldn't speak, she was really ashamed

- To what? - Inquired Ms. Jennifer, with a cross face.

- To kick his nuts as hard as I could - Greta covered her face.

- Oh! God! Both of you are a couple of perverted wicked people, I see! But you will pay for it, anyway, I won't call the police...

- Thanks, thanks, cried Greta, it's very kind of...

- Stop! - Shouted Ms. Jennifer - I didn't end my sentence! It won't be necessary to call the police as you will be punished anyway, you've been already punished, in fact.

- What do you mean? - Said Greta while looking at the pale face of her *********** husband.

- Those testicles have been fatally damaged - continued Ms. Jennifer, pointing at Adam's balls with her finger - the only way to save your husband's life is removing these ugly things before they begin to rot!

- Do you mean... do you mean **********? - Said Greta with horror - Oh! God! I never meant to...

- But you did - said Ms. Jennifer - He's about to loose his manhood, and you're about to loose your male, no more sex, dear! That will be you punishment for your evil acts. And besides, I have not any nurse available this morning - fucked strike! - so I need your help to do it.

Greta began to tremble all over, but decided to save his husband's life, started to help Ms. Jennifer in her task. In a half hour everything was done, and Adam's testicles and penis - also removed, to avoid the risk of gangrene, said Ms. Jennifer- were preserved in a jar, with alcohol and some other preservatives. Once Adam recovered consciousness, they returned to their home, both quiet and sad, with a jar and a hospital's bill.

After a few months, Adam had recovered from a severe depression, and Greta had started to recover her sexual life: she discovered Adam could do a lot of things without his testicles and penis, and in fact, sex had improved to her as now it was all centered on her pleasure. It was the only way for Adam: feeling that he was still able to pleasure her wife, he had become a master in oral and manual techniques. Everything seemed to be more or less normal again, when Dr. Grossbert, an Adam's friend visited them. After a lunch and a coffe, Adam decided to talk about his "little problem" to Dr. Grossbert, he didn't detail all the aspects of what had really happened, and he made up an attack by some thieves to cover up the truth.

- May I... May I see your testicles? - Asked Dr. Grossbert - I've recently finished a master on male genitals, and I saw some pictures about that kind of brutal damages, but I wasn't able to see them in a real patient, I hope you don't mind, but it would be quite interested in inspecting them, and I see you're fully recovered, so...

Adam agreed, and brought Dr. Grossbert the infamous jar, which was carefully inspected by Dr. Grossbert. After a few minutes, his face became pale, and his face filled with horror.

- But those testicles are just slightly damaged, no gangrene, no severe injuries, just a brush! No doctor in the world would decide to cut them off... sorry, to remove them! What in the hell! Who made that botch?

- Well, it was Dr. Jennifer who... - Said Adam, also pale and surprised.

- Dr. Jennifer? But she was suspended years ago! She was accused of brutallity and jailed! But... now that I remember... She left jail a few months ago, just a little time before the famous Hospital's strike... Damn! Obviously she took advantage of the lack of people in the hospital to enter there and pretend to be a doctor again, and she waited until she found a new victim... you! I'm gonna call the police...

- No! No! Never! - Shouted Greta, who had been quiet until that moment - Never! Never! Now I feel like a real woman, now this man is able to give me incredible orgasms, he is able to make feel incredible things all across my body, I have long days and nights of sex without having to care about those crappy flabby organs, without having to care about premature ejaculations, and all of this was possible thanks to Ms. Jennifer... Don't do that or... or... or I'll cut your balls off too! Now I know how to do it!

- Well, let's just pretend that nothing of this happened, Mr. Grossbert - said Adam, proud, feeling that now he was God to Greta - I'm happy, really, let's forget it.

Dr. Grossbert left the couple promising that he would never talk about that story to the police, to respect the secret as a professional, but thinking at the same time on his relationship with her own wife... could it be... improved by Ms. Jennifer?

dzwitch
01-16-2009, 06:39 AM
Mmmh... next time I'll attach a picture or a video to see if anybody wants to reply :asleep

Alec Anaconda
01-16-2009, 12:22 PM
To write a story in a foreign language is a noteworthy achievement.
Congratulations for doing that.

Correcting your use of dashes, in place of quotation masks, would easily improve this story’s readability.

Erotic fiction is not an easy discipline to master.
The reader needs to believe in your characters, their actions and their decisions.
It must also arouse your readers, however slightly.

If you write about action you have experienced, your work will become more plausible.
Good luck with the next one.

dzwitch
01-17-2009, 04:26 PM
To write a story in a foreign language is a noteworthy achievement.
Congratulations for doing that.

Correcting your use of dashes, in place of quotation masks, would easily improve this story’s readability.

Erotic fiction is not an easy discipline to master.
The reader needs to believe in your characters, their actions and their decisions.
It must also arouse your readers, however slightly.

If you write about action you have experienced, your work will become more plausible.
Good luck with the next one.

Thanks for the comments :-)