Sexism & Prejudice in S&M

[jm1803]

Prejudice bigotry, discrimination and sexism are all found in the pages of history. Curretly equal rights among gender and ethnicity has certainly increased, however these two groups are a subject of great issue. Historically one would think we would have learned from our past mistakes, (the KKK, the NAZI party, and other various groups claiming Superiority in some fashion) where either men and women suffered, or various groups of ethnicty were a target of discrimination, regardless we still see this same them resounding through time. Its as though we never really learned from our past mistakes. In S&M, women claim to be the superior gender, in other parts of the world genicide is still going on. My problem here is with all of us in the S&M community, that is the women who claim "superiority". One would think as targets of sexism, women would not take up the same postition as some of the male supermecist pigs out there, however by taking that stance, women have become the very thing they so despise. Maybe the jews should start killing of the germans to. repaying evil for evil is does nothing for the community at large. Any thoughts or comments are welcome.

[bustmyballs02]

In my experiences, it seems like the bedroom is a place for people to be there "anti-self." It's not uncommon for big successful CEOs to be submissive and enjoy cbt/ballbusting. There is also the strong stereotype of the prim and proper reverend's daughter to have a wild side in the bedroom.

Do others see this the same way?

[eric B]

S+M's not about politics it's about sex. If you find someone's attitudes offensive then just don't have sex with them.

[Teardrop]

It's perfectly fine to fantasize that one sex is more or less superior in the bedroom. Obviously, that's not so in the real world. As long as everyone can tell the difference between fantasy and reality I don't see a problem.

Myself, I find a dominant woman wearing a swastika sexy as hell. That doesn't mean I find racism or persecution of any people to be any less evil. I just enjoy playing with certain taboos in my own private fantasies.

[jedg1980]

Prejudice bigotry, discrimination and sexism are all found in the pages of history. Curretly equal rights among gender and ethnicity has certainly increased, however these two groups are a subject of great issue. Historically one would think we would have learned from our past mistakes, (the KKK, the NAZI party, and other various groups claiming Superiority in some fashion) where either men and women suffered, or various groups of ethnicty were a target of discrimination, regardless we still see this same them resounding through time. Its as though we never really learned from our past mistakes. In S&M, women claim to be the superior gender, in other parts of the world genicide is still going on. My problem here is with all of us in the S&M community, that is the women who claim "superiority". One would think as targets of sexism, women would not take up the same postition as some of the male supermecist pigs out there, however by taking that stance, women have become the very thing they so despise. Maybe the jews should start killing of the germans to. repaying evil for evil is does nothing for the community at large. Any thoughts or comments are welcome.


I understand your point, but I cannot disagree more with the connections you are making. The element of S&M are taboo and that is what makes it all the more erotic for the people that enjoy it. Assuming that the participants are willing and understand what they are participating in, then I dont think you can make comparisions to Nazi's exterminating people or the KKK. Its not like the Jews were willing participants in the Holocaust.

Most of the fantasy is such because it is so different from the every day life. For instance, in my career and previous positions, I am / have been in authority / leadership positions. I like ballbusting, and I really like dominating women in my private life, but that is my preference and it is a choice I make. I can and do draw a distinction between fantasy and reality and what is acceptable social behaviour outside of those boundries. If women want to act superiour and they find a lucky enough guy willing to enjoy that with them, then good for them.

[Alec Anaconda]

In sadomasochistic relationships, it is common for the “submissive” partner to be the one subtly controlling the action.

Typicality, with ballbusting, the woman’s motivation for attacking her man’s sensitive region is to give pleasure and arousal, not chronic trauma.

Although the stereotypical FemDom attitude is superficially sexist, this is all part of the game.

[zetsubou]

A lot of what could be seen as sexism in S&M is posturing for the camera, and acting for the sake of fantasy. How we can want someone to specifically enjoy hurting men without having some sexism to it. Guys who fantasize about submission in their sex life, and women who fantasize about dominance... it doesn't always carry over to the majority of their life. But our fantasies are our repressed desires aren't they? Or not so much repressed but forbidden/misunderstood.

Warped opinions should be expected... S&M is diverse and its not all 'PC'. What about the word slave? Obviously some submissives are being exploited all the time , whether they think they want it or not, and that is true with both genders.

Another thing-

You talk about the S&M community. Lets look at a very tenuous link. Prostitution:- (ignoring the huge thing that **** is) , one side paying the other for sex... which one is in power? The one with the product, or the one with the money? It's not very easy to answer. Both are being exploited in very different ways that cannot quantifiably be compared.

If you are with a woman in life, girlfriend, friend with benefits, marriage whatever, and she loves you, ballbusting will not be a sexist thing. If your paying a dom, they're not doing it for you. They're doing it to get their kicks. HUGE GENERALIZATION.

The problem is sexism and prejudice, not sexism and prejudice in S&M. Your talking about a manifestation of these problems that is much more obvious, yet also more shrouded (S&M).

I think.

[Alec Anaconda]

While we are on discrimination, what about the prejudice that is forever rearing its ugly head in this forum: ageism.

My twenty-first birthday is a now a pleasant memory rather than an anticipation.

Do the younger people here think that their genitalia will wither and drop off, before they get to forty?

[jm1803]

Ok, my problem with s&M is that women outside of the bedroom (for those of you who did not understand) that assert there female superiority as a personal philosophy.

[Alec Anaconda]

Okay, what do you think is the appropriate treatment for a bitch with an inflated ego?

[mick_sl8ter]

While we are on discrimination, what about the prejudice that is forever rearing its ugly head in this forum: ageism.

My twenty-first birthday is a now a pleasant memory rather than an anticipation.

Do the younger people here think that their genitalia will wither and drop off, before they get to forty?

If you put a rubber band around them, they might?

[misterjover]

I think racial domination is really fun to do with femdom. When the girls make racial comments about me, it really gets me going.

It's more humiliating when a hot babe throws bigotry into the mix; it causes a stronger emotional reaction to the domination.

[mick_sl8ter]

I think racial domination is really fun to do with femdom. When the girls make racial comments about me, it really gets me going.

It's more humiliating when a hot babe throws bigotry into the mix; it causes a stronger emotional reaction to the domination.

Could you quote the kind of things she says to you, that you like ?

[Trouble]

Okay, what do you think is the appropriate treatment for a bitch with an inflated ego?


CUNT PUNT, of course.

With regard to sexism and SM, I don't think we have a problem; the problem rises, as usual, from partners who carry the scenario out into reality. With any partner who does that, and fails to understand after it is explained it nice, two-syllable words, then you have a partner who is supposed to be a freak behind closed doors (for SM play) but elects to be a freak in public.

Or perhaps just in your own living room or at the dinner table, but, still, bedroom behaviour out of the bedroom. We have an acronym for this:

DTMFA!

(Dump The Mother Fucker, Already!)

There was a comment about ageism -- to which I can but add, AGEISM SUCKS! My partner and I are very far apart in age, and we prefer it if other people Mind Their Own Bizness!

[kerrpop]

I think racial domination is really fun to do with femdom. When the girls make racial comments about me, it really gets me going.

It's more humiliating when a hot babe throws bigotry into the mix; it causes a stronger emotional reaction to the domination.

If we must blend sex with politics: I think that the sexualization of bigotry, sexism etc. is a way to disarm those forms of oppression. Much how the word "nigger" was adopted by black Americans as a term of endearment, thus deflating the the word as a means of racist control.

You see a lot of sexualization of the church in bondage themes to counter to the sexual repressiveness of religion. Back in my school days, I remember a friend of mine who was getting verbally assaulted for being gay, he turned it around by making the assailant out to be "talking dirty" and totally served the jerk.

[mick_sl8ter]

My partner and I are very far apart in age, and we prefer it if other people Mind Their Own Bizness!

She is 21 and you are 12 ? :-)

MrJover, what kind of things do you like when it is said to you during femdom play ?

[zetsubou]

I agree. Racism should not be tiptoed around, rather it should be trivialized.

I have alot of black friends (I am white), and sometimes I'm the only white guy. We make jokes about each other all the time. Everyone knows it means nothing. Friends I call old, or i call children..

And S&M should only exist as an alternative on the side thing... so anything goes there, and definitely shouldnt reflect someones opinions... it wouldnt be as hot if they did!

[Nexus]

We're on this forum because we like our balls to be busted (or like to bust balls). Why bring up politics and discrimination?