Ideas on getting kicked

OK, I know walking up to a gal and telling her "the only thing bigger then her feet is her mouth" (Clint Eastwood) will get you kicked but what about not pissing them off to get kicked. I just found a method that may work. I spoke to a friend and in the conversation I said I was having trouble losing a few pounds but I had a surefire method. I told her (jokingly) if I didn't lose between 5-10lbs per week she could kick me in the balls as hard as she could. Imediatley she said she had just purchased a new pair of boots which would be perfect. The next time I spoke to her she asked if I had lost any weight, I said no. I told her when I saw her next I would get in position. Well the third time I spoke to her she again mentioned the weight loss program and she started talking about it saying she would kick me from behind so I wouldn't see it coming and how she was going to make sure I would realize my goal. The point is, she now brings it up and monday I'll find out how serious she is. Anyone else have any methods that aren't pissing women off to get kicked?

Maybe just ask her??? :?

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Originally Posted by Magnum

Anyone else have any methods that aren't pissing women off to get kicked?

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Just asking ALWAYS works. (At least, so far...)

I try to get women mad enough at me to do it, but that's only because I find it a turn-on. Women (and I would say "generally" but I have yet to run across an exception...) LOVE (not like, love) to kick guys in the nuts, so it's hardly necessary to piss them off; that's just one way to go about things.

One sex partner (who had not busted me [yet]) decided she was too tired one evening, so I told her I'd get blue balls and she said sorry, but she's too tired, and I suggested that she kick me in the nuts. She asked: "Uhhhhhh... Did I hear you correctly? Isn't that... I don't know, like, painful?" (or something like that) I assured her that she could not hurt me as badly as it hurts when I get blue balls for her.

Okay, that's an obvious LIE, a whopper, totally bogus. She didn't want to hurt me (yeah, right) but she didn't want me to suffer from blue balls, so she took pity on me and 'relieved' my suffering. So, yeah, you can get kicked in the sac without first insuling them, but that would take the fun out of it...

...I mean, why do you think I still talk to feminists?

Feminazi #23: "You MEN have been stealing our wind for thousands of years and denying our Womanhood it's rightful place. We think that when God made Woman, She made her with an intelligence that you should not underesimate!."

Trouble: "Frankly, I find that most of you bitches have a level of intelligence that is quite impossible to underestimate."

Feminazi #23: "I can't believe you just said that! And stop staring at my chest; you should be thinking of me as a whole, not a collecction of parts."

Trouble: "Frankly, bitch, I have never thought of you as anything BUT a hole."

You know, none of my feminist friends talk to me any more; I wonder why...

But, hey, that weight loss thing sounds like a good schtick, too.

Just asking doesn't always work for me. If I have a valid reason then its different (why, I don't know). Lately I've been getting the "I couldn't hurt you" reply, which really sucks because I know they would kick me if I was threatening their life or something. Anyway I just thought some may have a good way of making it sound like it would somehow benefit me or her. Like self defense practice maybe.

Maybe you could forge a note from your doctor saying that you have a special condition which requires being kicked in the balls twice a day. Or maybe you could get the hiccups and ask them to kick you in the balls to cure it.

Really, my feeling is that unless you know someone who seems particularly inclined towards ball kicking or other fetishy activity, only a girlfriend is likely to do it to you. With a girlfriend, you can sit down and have a long talk about it and explain how much it turns you on and that it is a sexual thing for you, that kicks in the balls hurt a lot, but seldom do much damage, and then ask her to kick you.

Asking someone who is just a casual friend to do something which is a fetish for you without disclosing to them why you want it done isn't likely to get much in the way of results. It's about like asking a woman if you can smell her shoes. She knows that it's odd for you to ask her, and if she's your friend, it's not really in line with your usual friendly relationship. Now, if there's some reason for her to kick you in the balls, then it might not feel weird to her, and it's a different matter. If it comes up in conversation, you could try telling her that you've never been kicked there and wonder how it really feels.

Also, what you might do, though, is confide in a female friend about your fetish and ask them to help you find a girl who is into kicking balls. They may well know someone that you don't.

Smack

But it's never as much fun if you ask them. The best thing is a spontaneous, unexpected kick.