Castration (fantasies, stories, pics, methods, etc.)

I'm always trying to figure out and understand things. I'm someone who has a need to understand and to know.

I don't understand my femdom ********** fantasies and the fetishes and feelings that are a part of them. My femdom ********** fantasies are a part of me, they are a part of me and of who and what I am. So I have this inner need to understand my femdom ********** fantasies and to understand the fetishes and feelings that are part of them.

They are not easy to understand. What man would have fantasies about having his testicles surgically removed and his manhood destroyed, or would want that somehow, even if it is performed by a very beautiful woman? Why would a man have femdom ********** fantasies? Why do I have them? They don't seem to be "normal," Of course what really is normal? So sometimes I feel there's something wrong with me because I have them, and that's a struggle.

I have a very strong inner sense that there is something I'm searching for through these fantasies, something spiritual and even religious. I know how that sounds, but it's something I feel down inside.

What is it that I'm really searching for through these fantasies and fetishes? How do I go about finding whatever it is I'm searching for through them?

I know I've talked about this in some of my other posts here, but I wish I could understand and know. It would all be much easier to deal with and live with if I could understand and know.

Does anyone else with femdom ********** fantasies have these kinds feelings about them?

I have fantasies in which I'm dressed in a long sleeve shirt with my arms covered completely to my hands in long sleeves. A group of women has strapped me down against my will to some kind of operating table. Then I am surgically ********* very slowly by a very beautiful woman surgeon or castratrix wearing a long sleeve shirt with her sleeves rolled up above her elbows, solely in the presence of other women. As she castrates me, the castratrix becomes and is God and afterword, she ****** me to forever serve and worship her as if she herself is God.

I'm trying to understand why I have these fantasies. Most of all I'm trying to understand what it is I'm searching for through these fantasies.

I would appreciate any thought and insights anyone has about this. I feel a need to understand, and I'm trying to understand.

Thanks for any thought and insights anyone might give me here.

I also do not understand where did the fetish of ballbusting, even ********** came from... But I've tried ballbusting with my girlfriends and , some of them understood it, even liked it, some of them did not understand, neither like it. But not far away from now, after beeing punched, squeezed and even kicked in my balls, i understood that I actually did not like it as much as I was thinking that I would. I do like me being ballbusted, but it is not so interesting as it were in the past. My fetish turned up to be different thing. I realized that I like to watch other males to be ball-tortured by beautifull women. You may find it odd but right now I would like to see my girlfriend kick and punch and even RIP OFF A MALES TESTICLES and then have sex with me.
for example this video makes me satisfied a little, I would want to be there to watch it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tJtb5p_03EE
But getting to the ********** fetish. Catsrtrix's pet, I've come up with an interesting QUESTION:
If the girl/woman who would ******** you, destroy your manhood with a sadistic smile on her face, would be at the same time in a RELATIONSHIP with another male, she would love him, treat him as her partner, and make you a slave for her. (sory for my f##ed up english) Would that make you jealous? Would you regret it afterwards? I myself would kill that guy... But actually I wouldn't have THE BALLS TO DO IT ... :Baahaha: ... Sory for that... I wish for you to find all the answers to your questions castratrix's pet.
I hope that my point of view doesent offend anybody. I would like to meet a girl/woman who would cut/crush with a hammer or anything else/stomp to death a mans testicles, not mine actually. (Well I prefer to keep them where they are :D) And have nasty, wild and hard sex with her. Some of you would say that this far away from female domination. But you know what... That is still my fetish

There seems to be a big difference between myself and others who have femdom ********** fantasies.

The femdom ********** fantasies others have talked about here and on other forums are just that, sexual fantasies, and that's it. Simply a physical or physical and mental sexual thing, and I feel that in my femdom ********** fantasies too.

But there is also a strong spiritual aspect to mine. When I'm fantasizing this happening to me there is something deeply spiritual, perhaps even religious, about the experience, as if the castratrix becomes and is God or she is a living embodiment of God, and God is female, God is Goddess. I know how that sounds, but that is how it feels.

I know how it feels but I'm not quite sure how to describe it. But that is what my femdom ********** fantasies feel like to me. That is why I'm trying to understand what it is I'm really searching for through my femdom ********** fantasies.

Hello. My first time posting here. While I fantisize about ********** I'm not sure if its something I want for real. Having lost a testicle before I was a teen(for medical reasons) may have been the genisis of my fantasies.

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Originally Posted by oneball

Hello. My first time posting here. While I fantisize about ********** I'm not sure if its something I want for real. Having lost a testicle before I was a teen(for medical reasons) may have been the genisis of my fantasies.

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well... we want see a picture of your genitals :iluvu:

One of my fantasies starts with me being led into a room (exam?) and then ordered to "Strip, get on the table and spread your legs."

Anyone care to continue?

Castratrix's pet
I've read your messages several times before and it seems a little strange to me that not only is the imagery you describe very specific, but you also keep using the same words. (I'm not complaining about the repetition, I really would like to understand your feelings better.) It makes me wonder if the words you use to describe it have some excitations associated with them similar to how the images do.

Since my earlier conversations on this site I have done a lot of thinking about what brings strange fascinations like these about. And I've learned a little by reading, none of it is very satisfying nor does it make me very happy. So I assume that it wouldn't make you happy either.

What seems to make most of the people on this board happy is to just go with these feelings, at least as far as enjoying and praising the porn, sharing it, keeping it available and so on. Some may also want to act it out.

I notice that there are a few confused members, and people who find some of the material that others are sharing and praising here to be rather disturbing.

I'll try and give a basic explanation of what's going on with people, who, like you, have a fascination with something very specific and abnormal.

First, I need to define abnormal. I do this so that you can be sure you know what I am talking about, and we know what we can and can't claim about things being normal and abnormal. People often have vague ideas about what words like normal mean that are not the same as the meanings for those words that others have.

Well, normal or abnormal is not a value judgement, it isn't insult or praise, its a statement of something believed to be a fact. Here's what I pulled off the first online dictionary to come up:

# noun: something regarded as a normative example
# adjective: conforming with or constituting a norm or standard or level or type or social norm; not abnormal (Example: "Serve wine at normal room temperature")
# adjective: being approximately average or within certain limits in e.g. intelligence and development (Example: "A perfectly normal child")

We seem to be dealing with definition 3. So something is normal if a lot of people do it or have it or want it. In a word its common. Common isn't necessarily good or bad, its just the way things are for most people.
There are some problems with trying to use the word average but I'd rather not go into those.

One of the most useful methods of explanation in today's world is the evolutionary explanation, and as in many other areas I think it can shed some light on this one.

The reproductive method for a man involves choosing a fertile female and mating. Males specialize in this to a much greater degree than females. But in order to reach the goal of mating and producing offspring males are first motivated by sensations of longing and a pleasure that satisfies this longing.

The longing that males feel isn't motivated by an image they have from birth, of what a woman should look like. Some aspects of a fertile woman may be recognized instinctively, such as breast size, or an attraction to full lips, but many other aspects of a woman's appearance change so much or are subject to fads that this explanation doesn't seem possible.

So as boys grow, they are learning to respond to certain stimuli with longing, and sexual interest. This interest usually attaches to women and to attributes of women that advertise fertility, health or sexual availability. But whatever mechanism causes us to make these associations between our longing and women or their attributes it also targets things that are not necessarily related to sex.

For example, you notice the slightly taller woman with the well-defined calves, but something of the shape of her high-heeled shoes also seems to be part of the experience. Which part do you focus on? Which aspect will make for healthy children? Are you attracted to her posture alone, or also to her fashion sense? And what if the shoe just seemed to be the most prominent feature of the stimulus?

Similarly, when you see a picture or movie of a woman giving a man a blow-job, you recognize the genitals, you know that having something wet and soft on them leads to pleasure and you may focus on the thought of her tongue. You may be interested in her apparent submission, or not. She may seem to be doing something special, and if you think it is taboo, it may seem even more special.

When you see a man hurt in his testicles, or have your own hurt, its a sensation in your genitals, it is very easy to confuse it with the feelings of sexual passion. This might not have much effect if it was done by a man, but the stimulus inherent in a beautiful woman is something else. How does the part of your brain that learns how to direct your feelings of longing make sense of this? Its a roll of the dice whether this will turn you on a little or a lot, or get burned into your memory so hard that you'll be dissatisfied with any other way of achieving sexual release. Your dice may be somewhat more loaded in that direction than many others.

Fetishes, (as such fascinations are called in common, rather than specialist language, though they are probably more accurately known as paraphilias,) often seem to be very specific. The person who has one sees the sexual attraction of it as completely obvious and the person who does not have it often has trouble seeing anything special about it at all. They also seem to be related to taboos. If a practice, or body part is hidden, that alone seems to produce some fascination with it.

A person becomes stimulated by something forbidden, the stimulation heightened by the feeling of passing a boundary or doing something bad, yet they enjoy it so much and have such a strong desire to be left alone to do it that they want to be able to honestly claim that they don't think it really is bad, that those rules shouldn't apply, and we have an interesting spectacle of people trying to deal with their cognitive dissonance.

Yes, we've now passed into my own personal guesses about the psychology of the ballbusting fetish.

Here's one for you: A taboo that brings fantastic ecstasy is transformed in the mind into something sacred.

Is there anyone out there who feels just like you do? Who has the same sense of the sacred? Maybe not, but there are others who have also found something that they feel strongly drawn towards, as if coming to a recognition of themselves. There are some people who have a fascination, apparently also sexually related, with amputees, who report that upon seeing an amputee for the first time felt a strong sense of recognition, believing that to be their true shape.

Now, even after all that I'm not going to say that there may not be something archetypal in your fascination with rolled-up sleeves. It does seem a very effective picture, and always makes me think of Rosie the Riveter when I read your posts.

Ok, I'm out of steam on that one for now.

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Originally Posted by Antigone

Castratrix's petHere's one for you: A taboo that brings fantastic ecstasy is transformed in the mind into something sacred.

Is there anyone out there who feels just like you do? Who has the same sense of the sacred?

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I've thought a lot about some of what you said Antigone. You said "transformed in the mind into something sacred," and you used the term, "sense of the sacred."

What has happened in my case is a sexual fantasy about femdom ********** has moved from being just physical and sexual, to being sacred and spiritual. A sexual fantasy in which I undergo surgical ********** performed by a woman has gone beyond the physical and sexual to include the spiritual and even the sacred. It has combined the physical, the sexual, the spiritual, and the sacred into one.

Look at the symbolism in my femdom ********** fantasy. It puts the castratrix in the position of being God, it makes the castratrix God and it makes God female.

I have never been comfortable with images of God as male, I'm only comfortable with images of God as female, so in my personal spirituality God is female, God is Goddess. I don't know whay I have those feelings, I just know that's what I've always felt. I usually refer to God as female with terms like "She," and often refer to God as The Goddess.

The castratrix is taking more than just my testicles. She is taking more than my ability to reproduce, more than my ability to have sex, more than my manhood. I am a man, so in ********** me what the castratrix is really taking is my very being, my very essence, the essence of all that I am.

It is a sacrifice. I don't know what the purpose is, but it is sacrifice. My ********** is surgical, so there is shedding of blood, my blood. There is bleeding not unlike the bleeding a woman does each month when she menstruates. Through ********** performed by a woman my very being, my very essence is sacrificed to The Goddess at the hands of the castratrix who is herself The Goddess, and it is done in a way that insures my faithfulness to Her. I know how that sounds, but that's how it feels when I'm fantasizing about a woman ********** me.

Even the sleeve fetish, it symbolizes dominance and submission. My arms being covered in long sleeves symbolizes my weakness, submission, a subserviant worshipful position, the inability to do things, it symbolizes my being bound and encumbered.

The castratrix in a long sleeve shirt with her arms bare to above her elbows with her sleeves rolled up symbolizes her as powerful, strong, dominant, in charge and in control, she is free and she is able to do whatever she wants and needs to do. The castratrix wearing a long sleeve shirt with her sleeves rolled up above her elbows symbolizes her as totally powerful and omnipotent.

That is the sense I have of what is going on in and through my femdom ********** fantasies. There is something I'm searching for through my femdom ********** fantasies, and I'm trying to figure out and understand what it is I'm searching for through them and how to go about finding it.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by bookoo

Check it out. Free Gallery of teasers. I am a loyal customer !!!!
This is the best stuff.
www.hardcbt.com

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They have lots of videos pretending to show a ********** in the end.
Are those real or just "mental"?
You could easily fake a ********** with a burdizzo, but one claims to be the complete crushing of a ball - how would you fake this?
Did you ever see one of the vids?

i saw one from *********, they zoom into the girls face and she moves the burdizzo away from the balls and then clamps down. :(

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Tinchen

They have lots of videos pretending to show a ********** in the end.
Are those real or just "mental"?
You could easily fake a ********** with a burdizzo, but one claims to be the complete crushing of a ball - how would you fake this?
Did you ever see one of the vids?

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They can NOT be for real since that would be illegal in pretty much any country, but with special FX, you can always "dress" a dead animal's testicles, such as pigs, and try to pass them as really crushing a human nut.

Once you realize that people actually eats :confused: dead pig's testicles, then I guess crushing a dead pig's testicle is just like crushing food.

Check this link for the so called food:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/shared/spl/h...ght/html/8.stm

Quote:

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Originally Posted by SavoirFaire

They can NOT be for real since that would be illegal in pretty much any country, but with special FX, you can always "dress" a dead animal's testicles, such as pigs, and try to pass them as really crushing a human nut.

Once you realize that people actually eats :confused: dead pig's testicles, then I guess crushing a dead pig's testicle is just like crushing food.

Check this link for the so called food:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/shared/spl/h...ght/html/8.stm

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Ah I see - its English!
must be!